


He Waits For a Miracle

by ich_bin_ein_stern



Series: I Just Really Love Haikyuu!! [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Eventual Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts, Kitaichi Trio - Freeform, M/M, Self-Indulgent, emotional/verbal abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2019-03-24
Packaged: 2019-07-04 15:57:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 30,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15844593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ich_bin_ein_stern/pseuds/ich_bin_ein_stern
Summary: A minute ago, he was on the ground after he and the others were tackled by their happily weeping senpai.They had just beat Shiratorizawa.And now - "Kageyama-kun? Are you paying attention?" - he's trying not to freak out because he's surrounded by distantly familiar faces while wearing a school uniform he hasn't worn in almost a year.(Previously titled "Rewind.")





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I done messed up when attempting to post Chapter Three.  
> I didn't save Chapter One so it looks different.  
> Sorry about that!

The moment the referee blows the whistle, the reality of victory settles in. Cheers erupt across the gym while Shiratorizawa's section remains silent via shock. He can't blame them. "Flightless crows" just beat a powerhouse, _national_ level school - it's enough to leave a bitter taste in the losing team's mouth (and that of their cheer squad). But not in his, though, because a giddy feeling overwhelms his senses. It bursts through when he opens his mouth to yell.

They did it.

They _did_ it.

Even when he's body tackled to the gym floor by his happily weeping senpai, elbows clacking against the smooth wood and back landing painfully, the feeling of elation doesn't vanish. From his position on the ground, he can scan the audience. Karasuno's section is going wild. He can see their alumni crying as they hug, Yachi being held up by Tanaka's older sister, and the principle - the _principle_ \- waving his toupee around madly as he cheers. 

For a split second, he thinks he sees familiar brown hair - no. _He_ wouldn't be caught dead at a game between Shiratorizawa and Karasuno. Not even to just study their plays and pick them apart (all he'd need to do is wait for a video to be uploaded onto the internet). Someone's elbow strikes him in the gut and his mind returns to the current situation. To his left, grinning like he was just handed Olympic gold, Hinata lays underneath the combined weight of Nishinoya and Tanaka. 

It escapes his mouth before he can think. "Hinata, dumbass!" But it doesn't deter Hinata's mood one bit. In fact, the smaller boy just sticks his tongue out. He also starts crying. Big, fat tears of joy roll down his cheeks at a steady pace. "Dumbass, stop crying!" Because Kageyama can feel the sting already building in his eyes. "If you cry, I-I might start crying - " But he just can't get the words out.

The first _hot_ tear of happiness slides down his cheek. 

Followed by another.

Kageyama closes his eyes. His chest heaves with joy. The cheers, as loud as they are, start to fade away seconds later. There's a distant sound that's similar to white noise. The pressure on his chest and legs disappears. He feels weightless, in a way, and chalks it up to victory overwhelming his senses. When he no longer hears his senpai talking in any variation, that's when things start to become strange. When he opens his eyes, the bright yellow lights from the gym ceiling are gone. So is the court and his team. Space around him is much more condensed.

" - and I expect you to ready for the quiz on Friday."

His head shoots up.

"Kageyama-kun?"

He looks around, sees students looking at him strangely or with vague concern, and frowns. Kageyama rubs at his eyes - _hard_ \- as if he can rid himself of the scene by sheer force of willpower (and pain). He glances down at his hands when he's done, sees them trembling when his vision clears, and thinks he's trapped in some joke of a dream. His fingers look a little shorter and his school uniform feels off in a horrible way.

Someone coughs. He pinches the skin between his thumb and pointer finger, nails digging in. It stings like a papercut. Kageyama hisses. This is _real_. The classroom. The students. The teacher staring at him in equal parts annoyed and concern. Kageyama recognizes all of it in minor memory recalls. He knows this class but hates the subject. If he were to leave, he'd know where the vending machines are. Maybe.

This is his reality and it's _not_ welcomed.

A minute ago, he was on the ground after he and the others were tackled by their happily weeping senpai.

They had just beat Shiratorizawa.

And now - "Kageyama-kun? Are you paying attention?" - he's trying not to freak out because he's surrounded by distantly familiar faces while wearing a school uniform he hasn't worn in almost a year. It's all wrong. Like someone's trying to put together the scene with the wrong puzzle pieces or he's the wrong piece squeezed in a space he doesn't belong. 

 _I don't belong here_ , he thinks while steadily growing panic. _I need to leave_.

"May I be excused?" Kageyama doesn't bother listening to whatever reply she gives because he's already packing up his belonging. He darts out of class to the confused chatter of his...classmates and the loud exclamation of the teacher. It doesn't matter. Not in the slightest. Racing past classrooms, he ignores the heads that poke out to watch him. A sick feeling tingles down his spine.

Kageyama locates a staircase with a wide enough space behind it for his body to fit into and pushes himself into the deepest corner, out of sight from the usual passer. There, he curls into himself with his knees against his chest. Head pressed to them forcibly, he starts silently questioning what happened. What happened to the gym and Shiratorizawa? Where are Hinata and the others? Why is he back at Kitagawa Daiichi?

 _Was...it all a dream_?

The first sob hits him like a punch to the gut.

 _Or am I trapped in a nightmare_?  

* * *

Kindaichi watches, with unwanted concern, as Kageyama races out of the classroom in a panic; his eyes already red-rimmed and face crumbled into disbelief. Their teacher stands at the front of the classroom in shocked silence, blinking rapidly as if she did not witness what they all witnessed. He knew she would have questioned Kageyama longer, demanding answers about his inability to answer her questions. 

"I - " she starts, seemingly unsure for a moment, " - let's continue."

As she begins speaking again, voice becoming steady as she goes, the atmosphere starts returning to normal. Well, as normal as it can be. Kindaichi can already see several of his classmates secretly texting behind their textbook; no doubt rumors about Kageyama's abrupt exit will carry on for the rest of the day. Probably already mangled with bias and - he stops. 

 _I don't care_ , he thinks angerly. _I don't care_.

Even so, he copies many of his classmates and shoots off a text to Kunimi. 

 **[Kindaichi 09:45]:** kageyama just raced out of the class

 **[Kindaichi 09:45]:** he looked confused as hell

Kunimi isn't a slow texter but he is in a much stricter class right now. Kindaichi doesn't expect him to reply for several minutes. In the meantime, he tries his best to pay attention and take notes (notes that he'll convince his friend to help him go over later because he has a test next week). When Kunimi does reply, Kindaichi has to lower his head to keep his reaction hidden.

 **[Kunimi 09:57]:** My entire class saw him run by. My teacher left the classroom to check on him. He hasn't come back yet.

 **[Kindaichi 09:59]:** do you think hes sick?

The next reply makes him scowl. He doesn't get a chance to answer because a round of chimes goes off above his head indicating it was time to move onto the next lesson. The moment their teacher dismisses everyone, chatter about Kageyama immediately picks up. Some of it is said with genuine worry while others mock - Kindaichi's scowl deepens - his hasty exit.

"Do you think he's sick?"

"Do you think he's hurt?"

"He looked like he was about to _cry_!"

Kindaichi moves past his classmates in a hurry, a sort of desperate need to get away from the concerns and taunts. His next class is history. He can manage his history before lunch. It's not exactly a boring class. Even when their teacher decided to dedicate several lectures to some old guy and his leadership skills or whatever, it can be interesting sometimes.

 **[Kunimi 10:00]:** Do you honestly care?

* * *

"I'm fine," Kageyama mumbles for the sixth time in the last three minutes. "I want to go back to class."

The nurse smiles kindly at him - it irritates him beyond belief - and hands him a cup of water. "You were found by _two_ teachers stuffed in the corner beneath the west wing staircase, Kageyama-kun. You had to be talked down from a panic attack. It took both teachers to convince you to come here." She writes something down on her clipboard. "I would say you're not fine."

Kageyama grunts. Rude, but he doesn't care at the moment. "Did you have to call my parents? This isn't serious!"

"You had a panic attack in the middle of class and tried to become one with the staircase. I believe that justifies a phone call to home." The nurse replaces his empty cup with another one. He hadn't even realized he drank the first one. "Besides, we're obligated by school policy to call parents in case of an emergency involving their child or children. We uphold our policies, Kageyama-kun."

But he can already picture the looks on his parent's faces at the thought of stopping by his school because he had a little panic attack (thus wasting time by keeping them from work). The irritation felt by his father hidden beneath a calm expression. His cold tone of false sympathy following as he asks blank questions of concern. Kageyama can imagine his mother reapplying her pale brown lipstick in the rearview mirror of her car before entering the school; the picture-perfect business woman. He can already feel her pointed nails digging into his skin when she hugs him out of obligation.

Never out of love or genuine concern.

"I'm sure it will all be okay, Kageyama-kun!" The nurse answers happily. "It could just be the stress of school on top of preparing for your volleyball tournaments." She nods to herself like she solved the problem. "You boys are always working so hard for this school and you always make us so proud. My nephew plans to attend this school when he's old enough - "

Kageyama stops paying attention. 

There's a prickle of something under his skin. He recalls a time when Yamaguchi mentioned having constant anxiety for weeks before and after practice and how it felt as if something was crawling underneath his skin. Of course, these comments were mentioned in passing and he never stopped to ask Yamaguchi how he handled it; just making assumptions that it'll pass as he gets better at volleyball.

 _I...really was careless_ , he thinks. _I'm sorry, Yamaguchi_.

He just really wishes Karasuno. He _misses_ Tanaka and Noya and their mindless rambles about their - "Beautiful!" and "Gorgeous!" and "Stunning!" - manager. He _misses_ Daichi's scary, but genuine questions about how everyone's classes are going and Suga's encouraging smile and Asahi's growing confidence to ask for a toss and Ennoshita's annoyed sigh over Tanaka's need to take off his shirt. He _misses_ Kinoshita and Narita (even if they aren't close, his senpai are still good people). Hell, he _misses_ the way Tsukishima irritates him over his tosses and mocking comments and Yamaguchi's determined smile as he succeeds in serving. 

By God, he _really_ misses Hinata's demand for moss tosses!

And it hasn't been a full day yet.

 _We just beat Shiratorizawa too_!

A knock on the door snaps Kageyama out of his thoughts.

"Tankei-san?" _So, that's her name_. "Kageyama-kun's mother is here."

(Later, he won't remember getting up from the bed in the nurses' office nor thanking the nurse for watching over him. He will, however, remember dread building up in his chest as he draws near the Dean's office and the way his hands shake inside his pant pockets. He will remember meeting the icy gaze of his mother as she sits off to the side, silver painted nails digging into the leather of her purse. 

He will remember the bland tone she uses when she greets him and asks about his well-being. He will remember her nails cutting into his shoulder when she seemingly just places it there as a sign of reassurance. Above all else, he will remember the smell of her perfume - something that will attract the gaze of many envious women and lustful stares of men - and how repulsive it is. It clogs his nose and makes it hard to breathe while she's standing next to him.

He exits the Dean's office much later with a great desire to wash his clothes.)

* * *

Kageyama feels a little ashamed to just be roaming the halls with no real goal in mind. Sure, the Dean told him he should return to class - "Since you believe you can handle the rest of the day." -  but where is the class? The class he's supposed to be attending is...English? Or math? Science or history? Which side of the school is it on? Is it upstairs or downstairs? Is it in the back part of the school or the front part?

He pauses by a window to gaze outside. The sun is high in the sky but there are dark clouds in the distance. If he's honest, a good downpour would lighten his mood. He always liked the rain. He likes the way it's capable of washing everything away so things can begin anew. There's a rumble in the distance but that's all that happens in the minutes he just stands there. The dark clouds don't even seem to be moving.

The slow, steady steps of a person approaching from behind pull him from his thoughts.

"You're supposed to be in class."

Even after today's mishap, Kageyama would recognize that voice anywhere. _You spent three years with him_. He turns around to see Kunimi walking towards him - one textbook clutched to his chest in a tight grip - with an apathetic look on his face. The only differences between Kunimi in middle school and Kunimi in high school, at least where physical changes come in, is his height and longer hair. 

"I know." Because what else is he supposed to say?

Kunimi pauses a good distance from him, head tilting sideways. His calculating gaze, one Kageyama should be used to by now, unnerves him. He's never been intimidated by the shorter boy before but it would be stupid to say he didn't feel uncomfortable right now - "You have history with Yuutarou." _Kindaichi_. "Class One-Four."

 _Upstairs_. _West wing_. _Near the side where the gym is_. Kageyama can already picture the classroom.

After speaking, Kunimi easily moves past him at an almost leisure pace. "I would recommend washing up in the bathroom first." He's almost to the corner where he'll turn and be out of sight when Kageyama calls out to him.

"Kunimi," he watches the other boy stop but not turn around, "thank you."

(If he had the privilege to see Kunimi's face after his spoken gratitude, Kageyama would have witnessed the indifferent expression on Kunimi's face morph to surprise. Alas, he doesn't wait to hear a reply - if any - and heads directly to the closest bathroom.)


	2. Chapter 2

Kageyama stares at his pale complexion in the mirror - taking in the puffiness around his eyes and the way his hair is somewhat a mess from running his fingers through it in a stressful manner - and just wishes he was anywhere else but here. Here, in this school, with people who wouldn't care about him for any other reason than playing volleyball (on a team that hates him, no less). He half hopes that he'll see Hinata in class. If anything, Hinata's bright hair and matching smile are familiar.

Comfortable.

But it won't happen. He won't see Hinata. He'll be surrounded by classmates who will know him but who he will not know. People who he forgot about the moment he stepped out of the school's doors for a final time (head bowed to avoid eye contact while everyone else is among friends). Unless it's someone on the volleyball team (but even then, his focus would only fall to Kindaichi and Kunimi because of their relationship - for lack of a better word).

The door to the bathroom squeaks open but Kageyama pays it no real attention. Instead, he turns on the water, cups some, and splashes his face a couple of times. He rubs at his sticky cheeks and uses a paper towel to pats at his eyes. Quickly, he runs his fingers through his hair and pats it down. His skin is tinted red but presentable, and his hair is a little damp. Still, it's an improvement. 

The tear tracks are gone.

Eyes clear, he sees a small - first year? tiny second year? really small third year? - standing behind him with wide eyes. Kageyama stares at him with a blank look, not particularly caring about what sort of rumors may start up from been seen. Gathering up his belongings, he offers a nod and walks out of the bathroom. The history class is nearby, probably, and he does feel a little shame about being mixed up in a school he's attended for three years.

He is relieved to see that the class is in the middle of reading a section when he appears at the door. Of course, that didn't stop anyone from looking up when he opens it. Kageyama heads directly to the teacher's desk and speaks softly with her, biting back a sigh of relief when she saves him from an explanation. She even smiles kindly and he can't even remember her name. The only seat available, as he scans the room, is directly next to Kindaichi.

Kageyama takes a seat, pulls out his book, opens it up, and stares. He stares and stares at the words but doesn't absorb them. Doesn't really care about them. Shifting in his eyes, his eyes start to droop. He still feels tired from crying and the thought of facing his mom at home - if she's even there when he gets home - is almost enough to send him into collapsed-like sleep.

Finding it hard to keep his eyes open, he curls over his desk and wills himself to keep staring at the words even if he's not reading them.

He can't afford to fall asleep.

 _Maybe this is just a bad dream_.

* * *

Kindaichi watches, as subtly as he can, as Kageyama fights to keep himself awake. Even his can see the underlying exhaustion in Kageyama's form and the way he's just staring blankly at the pages before him. Something - perhaps pity? - settles in his stomach. They aren't friends. They're barely even teammates. To Kageyama, he and Kunimi and everyone else on the team is a follower.

A peasant.

Someone not worth any time.

A spark of anger ignites in Kindaichi's chest and he snaps his attention back to their book. It really is a boring topic about an old general and his battle tactics. Maybe if he cared more for history, his grade in the class wouldn't be so bad. Kindaichi winces. Kunimi has already lectured him twice about the importance of maintaining a passing grade to stay on the volleyball team.

He hears a sigh of frustration from his left.

Glancing at the teacher (who is grading the essays they turned in yesterday by the looks of it), Kindaichi wonders if she heard it. Class ends in less than 15 minutes so she might want to discuss something - Kageyama sighs again. It's distracting. Part of Kindaichi wants to tell him to just go to sleep if it's taking too much effort to stay awake and the other part of him just doesn't care.

But that part is small.

(Kageyama is a pain in the ass but he is the official setter of their team and he's needed. He can't afford to fail any classes or the team will lose a rude and annoying and snappy ~~, but _good_ ,~~ player. On days like these, Kindaichi really misses Oikawa and Iwaizumi and their reassurances and friendly chats. How unfortunate that Kageyama is not like either of their former senpai.)

* * *

Volleyball practice is odd.

Kunimi watches, as silent as ever, while Kageyama tosses in a way that is different from any other time they've practiced or even played together. He appears more considerate but looks around every once and a while as if he doesn't recognize his own teammates. (It's irritating but he won't mention it.) Sometimes, in an attempt to be subtle, he looks at the spot next to him as if expecting someone to be there.

"It's just a phase," Kindaichi mumbles in passing. "He'll snap out of it soon and go back to barking orders."

But Kageyama doesn't.

Not even when his tosses are still missed or a first year doesn't jump high enough to block. He doesn't glare at anyone; mostly he just tries to move in a way that is less intimidating and more like a shadow. Kunimi's gaze snaps to the way Kageyama tenses when he's off in the corner to pick up balls. Incoherent grumbles soon follow and he's shaking his head.

"It's strange," Kunimi voices during a break.

"Strange?" Kindaichi is pulling his sweat-soaked shirt away from his body in disgust before letting go to take a swing from his water bottle.

Kunimi nods. "It's like he's unsure or -," he pauses to wipe his towel over his face, "- or he's expecting someone that _isn't_ any of us." _Ah, the irritation is back_.

"Now that you mention it," Kindaichi starts with a furled brow, "I could have sworn I heard him start saying another name before correcting himself."

"The one that starts with an 'H,'" Kunimi responds. "I'm surprised by how curious I am about this."

Kindaichi scoffs. "It pisses me off that I'm curious too!"

For a moment, they silently watch Kageyama clean up the balls so they can be used again. He's in no particular hurry and, by the time he completes the task, he's still off to the side by himself. It could almost be considered sad by the way he self-excludes today as opposed to any other day. Even though he has performed in top condition, there's no denying the exhaustion in his eyes or the wary looks he sends others.

That is until a first year boldly walks over to him.

"Kageyama-senpai?"

Kageyama looks up from where he's sitting against the wall but doesn't speak.

 _Rude_ , Kunimi knows Kindaichi is thinking. He, on the other hand, finds the interaction interesting.

 _Something's different_.

"C-Can you teach me how to toss from the baseline?"

"During free-time," Kageyama answers after a moment of silence.

Kunimi hears Kindaichi's sharp inhale.

The first year bows twice and holds for a moment. "Thank you, senpai. Thank you so much!" An uncomfortable look appears on Kageyama at the show of gratitude but he manages a nod and looks away - a clear dismissal. The first year doesn't seem bothered at all. He returns to the cluster of the rest of the first years and they begin talking in a horrible attempt to be quiet.

"He actually said 'yes,'" Kindaichi whispers. "As in, he'll teach Onaku how to toss."

"Well, Onaku is a first year set - "

"That's not Kageyama."

Sighing, Kunimi glances up at Kindaichi's serious expression. "What do you mean?" Humoring his friend is better than ignoring him; makes the whole situation less of a hassle.

"That's clearly an impostor!" Kindaichi lowers his voice when their coach glares in their direction. "He hasn't snapped once today!"

"Shouldn't you be happy he's not acting like a king?"

Kindaichi crosses his arms over his chest while glaring at the ground. "It's just...creepy. I'm pretty sure I heard him say 'good job' to me twice."

"Or maybe you're imagining it," Kunimi offers. "He stopped doing that in the middle of second year."

"Yeah. Probably."

* * *

He avoids everyone as best he can during practice save for the first year who requested his help, the captain, and their coach. He sits off to the side during both breaks and only speaks minimally when spoken too. The first year - Onaku - hesitates during their free-time practice. Even the first year spiker - Hansu? Hantaen? - hesitates to spike. Kageyama knows the younger boy is waiting to be reprimanded for messing up.

 _I'm not that person anymore_ , Kageyama thinks. _Or, I'm trying really hard not to be_.

"You need to be able to read your spiker before he gets in position to spike," Kageyama states when he stops Onaku from tossing again. Seeing the confused look on the younger boy's face, he elaborates. "You have to think quicker than your spiker. You have to get into position before you even touch the ball at the same time watching him to make sure he's ready to be tossed too. Something like this has to be done quickly."

"O-Okay," Onaku nods. "I'll try."

"Let's do it again," he says. "We have half an hour remaining before practice is over and I can't - " _I don't want to stay late when_ he _isn't here_. " - stay late tonight."

"Yes, sir."

He tries not to flinch.

Kageyama ignores the two set of eyes burring their way into his back.

( _"Don't apologize!" Kindaichi snaps. "Because I won't either!"_

_He falters, barely speaking above a quiet tone. "Yeah."_

_"You're still an oppressive king, as far as I'm concerned! You're irritating, and there's no one I want to crush more than you!"_

_"Yeah."_ )

He shakes his head to rid himself of that memory. _Whatever_. _They'll think what they'll think_. Kindaichi, more than likely, has already come up with several ways to avoid him now that he's acting in a calmer manner. _I wish Suga-senpai was here_ , he mourns silently. _At least there'd be another spiker to assess Onaku's skills and maybe give a few tips to ease his nerves_. _He does it so easy_.

"We're ending practice with dives," their coach calls out. "Free-time ends in 15 minutes. You can pick up individual practice after we're done or in the morning."

"Yes, coach!"

* * *

" - videos of him on Youtube. We can still practice tomorrow morning and after school, but I learned a lot from him just by watching. Take some notes if you think you need to and we'll go over them in the morning." Kageyama brushes past Kindaichi as he leaves with Onaku right on his heels. "But repetition is the best way to get the result you desire. You know this."

Onaku is practically beaming by the time Kageyama stops speaking. "Thank you, senpai!"

Kageyama nods. "Good night." It's clearly meant to address everyone still left in the gym. He walks off without waiting for any response - only Onaku and his friend actually respond - and disappears from sight a few moments later.

"Do you think it's a fluke?" Kindaichi overhears the first year spiker ask.

Onaku frowns. "I hope not. Today," he pauses briefly, face turning red, "has been one of the best practices I've had." They start walking away after brief 'good-bye's'.

 _I wouldn't say that_ , Kindaichi thinks, _but it's been...better_. _Why does that piss me off_?!

"Don't think too hard."

Kindaichi jumps almost two feet in the air. "You need to stop doing that to me!"

"It would be nice if today wasn't a fluke," Kunimi states while ignoring the way Kindaichi glares down at him in annoyance. "I don't want to deal with a snappy king in the morning. That's not a good way to start the day."

"Let's just go get something to eat," Kindaichi responds. "I don't want to heat up leftovers tonight!"

Kunimi hums. "You're buying," he deadpans before walking away.

"Hey!"


	3. Chapter 3

Walking into his home is like any other day.

It's completely silent. It's stuffy because the windows haven't been opened in a while. He doesn't see the shoes of his parents at the door or their business jackets. The only signs of living within the house come from himself - shoes off at the door, he shoulder bag next to them, and an empty bowl sitting next to the sink - and the nice furniture about the house. A single photo of himself, taken during his first day of middle school, hangs near the front door.

"I'm home," he calls out uselessly.

Like most days, he receives no reply.

 _You didn't see their cars but you still hoped_. Kageyama glares at his surroundings. _You need to stop giving them your hope_.

Sighing, he walks over to the kitchen sink and takes care of the single bowl with dried soggy bits of cereal inside. "Why do I even bother anymore?" Truth be told, he knows why he still holds out hope for his parents. Parental affection aside, it would just be nice to come home to someone who would then proceed to ask about his day. Someone from his family (no matter how small it is).

Bowl cleaned and placed in the dish drainer, Kageyama sets about opening the first-floor windows to get a nice breeze going and grabbing a dust rag. Even if his parents are rarely home, he refuses to sit around in a dusty, stuffy home. It takes him about an hour to wipe down the first floor. He considers doing the second floor too but the realization that he needs to get his homework done outweighs that desire. 

* * *

Math is difficult.

"Why are we doing long division?! We have calculators!"

History is better (even if he knows he'll barely remember any of it tomorrow).

"Could political disputes be settled with volleyball?"

Science is whatever.

"That's a pretty neat looking rock."

English...is a whole different story.

"Who or whom?" Kageyama mumbles. "Does it even matter? They both sound right!"

He eventually gives up on English. 

* * *

Before he knows it, it's way past time to make dinner. Too tired to cook (but never too tired to play volleyball), he changes into a clean pair of shorts and a shirt. It's just past 9 PM and he doubts he'll see his parents at home tonight or in the morning or whenever he's around. Volleyball in one hand and water bottle in the other, he leaves his house after making sure to close and lock all the windows and makes his way to the outdoor court roughly 10 minutes away.

 _Hinata would meet me there if I asked_. _Or_ , he thinks, _he'd already be there waiting for me_.

It has cooled down significantly but he isn't cold in the slightest. Rather, he feels overheated after everything he has accomplished today. Even though it's later than usual for him to practice, Kageyama can't help but stick with the routine he and Hinata came up with since they're not allowed to stay late most nights in Karasuno's gym. Not even Tanaka is willing to stay past 7.

Taking a deep breath, he starts his warm-up stretches beside the court.

( _"Hey, hey!" Hinata shouts. "Are you done stretching yet, Yamayama-kun?"_

_Kageyama snorts. "Do I look done, dumbass?!"_

_"Don't yell at me! It was just a question!" Hinata has one of his hands curled into a fist._

_"Stop asking stupid questions then!"_ )

"It takes more than five minutes to warm up properly, dumbass."

( _"Want to practice our quick?" Hinata asks as they cool down for the night._

_"Only if you actually plan on hitting it this time."_

_Hinata glares. "I've only been a little distracted today!"_

_"Distraction can be the difference between match point or not."_

_"Whatever. Sorry."_ )

Kageyama grabs his ball and gets up. He stares down at it. Usually, Hinata chases after the ball once he spikes it. Hinata isn't here right now. No one is. A large gust of chilly wind overtakes the court for a moment but, for once, the cold settling in his bones isn't because of it (but of something else). Tomorrow will be another day at a school he still barely cares about, practicing with a team that thinks he'll go back to his "kingly attitude."

He squeezes the ball tightly.

"I'll show them."

 _I have changed for the better_. 

* * *

It surprises Kindaichi when he shows up for morning practice and Kageyama isn't there. Kunimi meets him at the door and they speak in hushed voices while the first years and a few second years linger by, each harboring sleepy expression and instant breakfast meals. The sun wouldn't start to rise for at least half an hour and Kindaichi knows damn well that Kageyama only lives 20 minutes away from the school.

"The first time he oversleeps?" Kunimi offers. "I guess not even he can be perfect all the time."

But it only serves to make Kindaichi frustrated. "Where the hell is he?!"

"I didn't think you'd be so concerned for his whereabouts, Yuutarou?" If there's one thing Kindaichi doesn't appreciate about Kunimi, it's how insightful he can be at the most unwanted times.

"He's messing with the flow!" He snaps, agitation claiming his tone. "As if yesterday wasn't bad enough."

Kindaichi certainly doesn't appreciate the way Kunimi rolls his eyes. "For once, we got through a practice that didn't involve any yelling or demands from Kageyama. I count that as a win in, and of, its self. I really don't want that to start up again, even if it's not normal."

Onaku shows in a bright mood but it quickly disappears when he realizes Kageyama hasn't arrived yet.

"This...isn't really normal for Kageyama-senpai," Onaku's friend - Hansu? Hanseu? - mumbles.

"M-Maybe he forgot to set his alarm," Onaku defends. "I mean, he did seem really out of it yesterday."

"Sure. I mean, he didn't yell at anyone."

"Shut up, Hantaen! I think we can all agree that's better!" The first year puffs his cheeks. "Besides, he promised to help me." The droop of his shoulders causes the agitation Kindaichi feels toward Kageyama to increase.

Hantaen holds up his hands in surrender. "Come on, now. He's technically not late. Not even Tachi-senpai is here."

And that's true at least. Their captain is usually one of the first to arrive because he possesses the key to unlock the gym.

"I guess - " Onaku stops talking when something behind his friend's shoulder catches his attention.

Curious, Kindaichi angles his head back to look as well. Side-by-side and very clearly in a deep discussion, Kageyama and their captain walk towards the gym. Even in the pale light given by the lamp posts along the pathway, he can make out the bags under Kageyama's eyes and the way his shoulders start to tense the closer they get. Captain Tachi states something which causes a deep-seated look of defeat to appear on Kageyama's face before it disappears instantly when they join the group.

 _What is that about_?

"Kageyama-senpai!" Onaku yells. "Tachi-senpai! Good morning."

While Tachi verbally responds, Kageyama only nods. 

Again, he self-excludes by standing away from everyone as the gym doors are unlocked (even Onaku has the decency to stay away briefly).

"We'll start with warm-ups and then split off for individual practice. Work on things that need the most improvement. Don't hesitate to ask for guidance when you need it. Am I understood?"

"Yes, captain!"

* * *

Kageyama woke up like he does every day, refreshed and ready to play volleyball.

It is only when he sees his school uniform that he realizes that everything that happened yesterday actually happened. He really did have a panic attack behind a flight of stairs. His mother really did show up at school and offer no comfort to his situation. He really did practice late last night without Hinata. Everything is the same as it was yesterday. Everything is still wrong.

 _Why_? _Why is this happening_?

"Kageyama-senpai?" Onaku asks as he moves closer. "Um, are you okay?"

"I don't have a choice but to be."

"Sorry, what?"

He just shakes his head at Onaku's confused look. "Don't worry about it. Let's finish warming up and then we'll work on your tosses. Did you take my advice?" Because, in all honesty, it's probably the best advice he can give to anyone who wants to even remotely be a good setter. Including himself.

"Yes!"

"Good."

Onaku starts speaking rapidly, even catching the attention of their teammates. " - and Oikawa-san tossed from all the way off to the side! It was really amazing! I can't believe you got to be on the same team as him, Kageyama-senpai. Well, you and Kindaichi-senpai and Kunimi-senpai. You can see this sort of aura around him while he plays. No wonder every team he's on is good."

"Oikawa was a star setter on our team two years ago," Tachi calls out from near the bench where everyone's water bottle is. "So much so that even officials from Shiratorizawa - as well as their ace - tried to convince him to attend their school."

"Isn't Shiratorizawa the number one school in the Miyagi Prefecture?"

"One of them," Kageyama answers before anyone else. "Seijoh is also filled with incredibly strong players. Oikawa-senpai and Iwaizumi-senpai - our former ace - attend Seijoh currently."

"Oh!" Onaku lights up. "I saw Iwaizumi-san in a lot of the videos. They blend really well together."

Kageyama nods. "Best friends since birth, I think."

 _Where Oikawa is, Iwaizumi is almost always just around the corner_.

"Let's finish up," Tachi states just as Kageyama is opening his mouth. "Or we'll spend the morning doing drills." 

* * *

"I don't have a choice but to be."

The look on Kageyama's face is _just_ enough to make Kunimi pity him - even if he really doesn't want to pity someone like Kageyama.

"What happened to him?" He hears Kindaichi ask.

"Wake up call about life?"

Kindaichi snorts. "I'm still going with my theory that he's an impostor."

"Let's hope that's not the case. Dealing with kidnapping - or possible murder - would be tedious."

"I worry about you," Kindaichi states after a moment of silence. "Seriously."

Kunimi shrugs.

There has only been one other case he can recall a sleepless Kageyama and it resulted in one of the final strikes against their friendship.

( _"You need to stop taking your frustrations out on Yuutarou, Tobio."_

_Kageyama glares at him but it only serves to make the purple under his eyes stand out more. "If he would just jump higher, everything would be fine."_

_"Your tosses are becoming too difficult to meet. Not everyone can jump that high." Annoyance seeps into his tone. "I don't know what's going on with you, but you need to learn to deal with it. It's affecting everyone."_

_Something falters on Kageyama's face and then he glares viciously at Kunimi, eyes flashing dangerously. "No. You guys need to get better. How do you expect us to win when our plays are only half-assed?!"_

_"Tobio - "_

_"I'm done talking."_

_And that was that._ )

Kageyama offers a hand to Onaku and yanks him up the moment the first year grabs it. He does the same for Hantaen. Their captain blows a whistle and individual practice begins. Immediately, Onaku starts yanking a silent Kageyama to the opposite side of the court while speaking in an excited tone. Hantaen follows after at a more leisure pace. He still seems to be wary of Kageyama's personality shift.

 _What could have caused him to change so abruptly_?

Kunimi recalls seeing Kageyama race by his classroom yesterday, completely distraught.

 _What caused his change a year and a half ago_?

( _He stands outside with Kindaichi, the both of them waiting for Kageyama to show up. He has been closed off lately while giving very little information about what's going on outside of school and practice. He smiles less and less as the days carry on. He's much more focused on volleyball than even those around him; than even his friends. It's becoming bothersome._

_"Oh!" Kindaichi perks up. "I see him."_

_Kageyama is heading towards him, but Kunimi can clearly see that he's in a foul mood. "I wonder what's wrong..."_

_"Morning - "_

_"No now, Yuutarou." Kageyama brushes past both of them without so much as looking either of them in the eyes._

_Practice is really stiff that day._ )

"I will get to the bottom of this," Kindaichi vows. "He's really creeping me out."

"You're easily creeped out, though."

Kindaich huffs. "When has Kageyama ever talked so normally?!" His leans closer so he's not overheard.

"First year," Kunimi answers immediately. "The first part of second year."

"Kindaichi! Kunimi! What are you two doing just standing around?"

"Nothing!"

"Exactly! Get moving!"

* * *

A grin - small as it is - appears on Kageyama's face when Onaku nails the back toss perfectly for the first time. Hantaen spikes the ball straight down as hard as he can and the combined gleeful shouts of Onaku and Hantaen draws the attention of everyone. The court erupts into cheers. The excitement slowly dwindles down when Kageyama approaches the two first years. He gets it, of course. Practically everyone expects him to snap out a criticism.

"That was good. Let's see you do it again."

The collective breath of the team releases in shock.

"O-Oh, yes!"

And Onaku does manage three more baseline tosses before it's time to call it for the morning because classes begin soon. Inside the locker room, Kageyama sits away from his teammates and slowly gets dressed in his uniform. He prefers Karasuno's all black uniform to Kitagawa Daiichi's dark brown khaki pants, white polo shirt, matching sweater vest, and a tan cardigan. Fewer layers with Karasuno's uniform. He can feel Onaku's beaming gaze on him as he ties his shoes.

The first year's smile is similar to Hinata's but nowhere near as large or sunny - not that he means that in a bad way, of course.

"Senpai, thanks for this morning and last night. I really learned a lot."

Kageyama stands up and grabs his bag. "Don't thank me for something I should have been doing since the beginning." He leaves the locker room after nodding towards the rest.

* * *

"So," Hantaen starts when a full minute of surprised silence passes, "does anyone know what's wrong with Kageyama-senpai?"

Onaku scowls deeply. "Stop saying that!" He roughly grabs his shoulder bag from Hantaen's out-stretched hand and storms out of the locker room.

"I didn't mean it in a bad way," Hantaen mumbles after bidding the rest of his senpai a good morning. "It was just a question?"

Kunimi stands next to Kindaichi and they both stare at the spot Onaku was occupying moments ago. "I remember a time when Kageyama used to make him cry in the bathroom." Starting to button up his sweater vest, he continues, "Kageyama's abrupt change in personality is both a blessing and a curse." At Kindaichi's confused expression, he sighs and elaborates. "It's nice to not be yelled at to move faster or jump higher or block better but his pleasant attitude is not something I want to get used too."

"Because he can revert back to the tyrant king at any moment?" Kindaichi asks, nose wrinkling in distaste.

"Precisely." 

"Better to not get our hopes up."

When they exit the locker, they pause. Off to the side, within a deep conversation, is Kageyama and their captain. In the sunrise, the shadows cast over Kageyama's face make him appear older, more firm. Even though it is abundantly clear that he disagrees with whatever Tachi is saying, he's maintaining an open posture to indicate respect. Whatever their conversation is about, it appears to be troubling Kageyama a great deal because he's gripping the strap to his bag unnecessarily tight. Kunimi doesn't like being out of the loop on serious things.

" - understand that it'll take time for everyone to ease up," they hear Tachi said. It's followed by Tachi placing a hand on Kageyama's shoulder. They miss part of his final reply. " - and you need to accept that."

Kageyama's shoulder slump in defeat. "I understand. Thank you for talking to me." Dark blue eyes peer at them over Tachi's shoulder. "Have a good morning."

Kunimi knows he shouldn't be confused on whether he and Kindaichi are part of the last comment or not while Kageyama walks away.  

"He's making an effort."

Hearing Kindaichi's confused hum beside him, Kunimi offers a simple, "Captain?"

"I don't want my last year in middle school to end on a bad note," Tachi states. "I would like to think _everyone_ feels the same way." He gives them a pointed stare before walking away.

"Why do I feel like I'm missing something?" Kindaichi asks.

"When are you not missing something?"

Kindaichi's angry comment is cut off when the school's chimes sound off.

"Whatever," Kindaichi mumbles. "Let's just go."

Kunimi follows along silently, eyes straying to the sky as if willing it to give him the answers he seeks.


	4. Chapter 4

Kindaichi knew this would have happened eventually. With the year slowly but surely drawing to an end, group assignments are bound to happen. He just didn't think his partner would be Kageyama - _Of all the rotten luck_! - and some random kid that he doesn't even remember the name of (and it was said barely a minute ago). Their teacher calls out each name but Kindaichi is only curious about how Kageyama reacts to being in a group with him. 

He doesn't react beyond a brief nod. He doesn't even turn to acknowledge him or their partner - _Tch, typical_! - or even look up at the teacher. Kageyama remains stiff and silent in his seat despite the excited conversation all around them once their teacher stops calling out names. She then asks them to  _calmly_  move near their partners and began discussing how to split up their sections for this particular assignment and how they might want to present as a whole.

When Kageyama sits across from him, Kindaichi can finally look him in the eye. It's completely unexpected to have Kageyama stare at him so intently (it can almost be seen as unnerving). His blue eyes watch every move he makes, every breath he takes, and snap to his hands when they settle on top of his desk. Kindaichi sighs and Kageyama returns to staring him in the eye. Their partner flips open his notebook and clears his throat.

"We have to write a poem together."

Kindaichi does not sigh in relief when Kageyama finally looks away - his pride keeping him from doing so - and turns to their partner. "Uh, sorry, I'm not really a poetry person." That's something more along the lines of Kunimi's area of expertise. "I don't really care about what the topic is about. It needs to have long - what are they called - not paragraphs but, uh - "

"Stanza." Kindaichi blinks when Kageyama interrupts quietly. "It's called a stanza."

"Yeah," he mumbles. "That."

"Kageyama-san, do you like poetry?"

Kageyama nods, gaze averted to his own desk. "Some." They wait to see if he'll elaborate but he doesn't.

"Okay," their partner nods. "I'm pretty indifferent to poetry myself."

"We'll need to pick a topic and decide a length," Kageyama states. "Judging by what others are saying around us, we should probably think outside of the box."

"Unless you two completely object, let's not write something about romance or true love or whatever." 

"Antoya-san, what do you think the topic should be?"

_So that's his name_ , Kindaichi thinks offhandedly while ignoring the very small, very brief moment of disappointment that Kageyama didn't directly ask him first.

"Something that's fun or exciting. As you said, we need to think outside of the box."

Kageyama nods. "And you, Kindaichi?"

"Something that isn't lame. Maybe it can be about friendship or overcoming a tough situation?"

A flash of something - maybe pain or regret - crosses Kageyama's face. At this moment, Kindaichi can just _see_ the way Kageyama is shutting down and pulling back. He shifts a bit away from Antoya and lowers his gaze, face blank. He sort of curls into himself to see less big and keeps his hands in his lap. Antoya seems to notice this as well and sends Kindaichi an inquiring look. Kindaichi attempts to shrug subtly. 

_Was it something I said_?

* * *

"He shut down completely after I said that," Kindaichi mumbles around a full mouth of food. 

Kunimi idly turns the page of his math textbook. "Why do all our recent conversations keeping falling to Kageyama?"

"Would you rather talk about volleyball?" 

At this, Kunimi snorts. "We could discuss your academic progress. Have you studied for your history exam next week?"

"Yes?"

"Is that a question or a confirmation?" 

Kindaichi moves to reply but stops suddenly, eyes widening. "What the - ?" He's looking on Kunimi shoulder, his expression swapping agitation to surprise to concern. Kunimi knows his friend well enough, can read him well enough.

But then, Kindaichi is an open book.

Curiosity getting the better of him, Kunimi glances over his shoulder. There isn't a lot of people in the courtyard with it being pretty humid outside but Kageyama is unmistakable. He's moving toward them, then passes them in a hurried rush, before disappearing within the gym off to their left. His head was bent down, his hands were clenched, and both boys clearly saw tears. The lunch period doesn't end for at least 20 minutes. 

"I told you he shut down in class," Kindaichi picks at his meal. "Right after I spoke."

But Kunimi doesn't respond. 

His eyes remain on the closed gym doors.

"You know," he starts after hearing Kindaichi impatient grunt, "I haven't seen him this upset since the beginning of the second term."

"And his situation just a few days ago?"

Kunimi shakes his head, eyes returning to his book (it continues to remain uninteresting). "That was panic. This is sorrow."

"I didn't mean to upset him - " The familiar sound of a ball slamming into the wooden floor of the gym stops him. It's soon followed by another and another. If possible, each sounds a little more vicious than the last.

"Hopefully, he's working it out."

* * *

Kageyama is sick and tired of crying.

He's sick and tired of freezing up.

"I will find a way to get back," he grunts. His palms ache with a careless exertion of energy.  "Or I'll find them or I-I'll figure something else out."

( _"I'm sorry," Hinata whispers._

_They're finally sitting next to each other on the bus, bruises on both fading to light shades of yellow-blue. Kageyama breathes in, out, in, out, and nods. His throat clogging up with an emotion he can't bring himself to classify._

_"I'm sorry, too," he replies._

_Hinata looks out the window. "I...still want to learn how to be strong on my own but - "_

_"You're a spiker. You_ need _a setter." He doesn't know any other way to stress the point._ )

Kageyama glares at his hands. The other side of the gym is littered with volleyballs. 

_Where does Hinata live right now_? _I could always google_ _Yukigaoka Chūgaku_. _It can't be_ that _far away from here_. With that in mind, he begins collecting the balls at a steady pace. _Will Hinata be open to meeting with me_? _Would he be scared_? _Will this all be for nothing_?

* * *

"You're not focusing," Kageyama tells Onaku. They're off to the side, just the two of them, and he more or less has the boy backed into a corner. He moves away after realizing it. "Why?"

Onaku kneels on the ground, panting. Kageyama can see his palms shake against his knees. "I'm sorry, senpai."

"I don't want an apology." And immediately takes back his words when the younger boy flinches. "I just want an explanation," he quickly amends. "You were doing so well yesterday and the day before. This is unlike you."

"I don't know what's wrong, senpai."

( _"I don't know what's wrong," Kendaichi whispers. "I just can't keep up with you anymore."_ )

Kageyama pushes that memory away - pushes Kendaichi's fallen expression away - and offers a hand to Onaku. "We'll try again later. If you want to stay late, we can. I don't mind." _I don't, I don't, I don't_.

"Do you really mean it?"

( _"Are you staying late?" Hinata asks with a wide grin._

_Kageyama snorts. "Duh!"_

_But Hinata isn't deterred. He just keeps grinning. He's grinning when he responds: "So you'll toss to me like always?"_

_Something about the way he looked at Kageyama caused his heart to pick up._ )

"Yes," because what else should he say? "We'll stay late as long as we're allowed too."

Onaku's surprised expression quickly morphs into a grin. "You know, senpai, you've been pretty nice lately."

Shrugging, Kageyama turns away to hide his flustered cheeks. "I could start yelling again? Maybe I'm being too soft with you all." It's a joke. He attempts to grin.

"No," Onaku shakes his head. "No - " And then he stops when he sees Kageyama's face. "Senpai, you're scary sometimes."

A sense of freedom washes over Kageyama's body - _"Bakayama, you have a scary face sometimes!"_ \- and he bites his tongue to keep the "dumbass" from passing his lips. No need to make Onaku feel rejected with his words.

"Are you ready to try again?"

"Yes!" Onaku hops to his feet. 

* * *

"We'll stay late as long as we're allowed too."

Kunimi isn't stupid.

He recognizes that look of longing on Kageyama's face. 

_Have you finally realized what you've pushed away_?

"I could start yelling again? Maybe I'm being too soft with you all."

It's a joke.

Kageyama is joking.

He never thought he'd see - _hear_ \- something like that again.

( _"I really don't want to take this exam next week!" Kendaichi declares as he flops over on Kunimi's, his feet end up in Kageyama's lap. "Akira, take my exam for me!"_

_Kunimi rolls his eyes while fondly whacking Kendaichi over the head with his Pikachu plush. "That's why you're here to study, dumb-dumb."_

_"Rude!" Kendaichi practically yells. "Tobio, are you just going to sit there and not defend me?!"_

_With his notes already out, Kageyama shrugs. "Akira is the only reason I'm passing right now. I'd throw you into an ocean of Oikawa-senpai's fangirls if it meant he'd help me study."_

_Silence, and then - "You both suck!"_

_Kageyama and Kunimi share a secretive smile._ )

Kunimi squeezes his water bottle.

_What, exactly, have I pushed away too_? 

* * *

Late practice with Onaku is nowhere similar to late practice with Hinata. Onaku isn't as outspoken (Demanding!) as Hinata and his self-doubt damages his focus. Without the others around, he seems less comfortable; producing more errors than Kageyama originally thought he would. It makes things very clear that they'll have to work on their communication. They don't say much unless Kageyama has a critique or Onaku has a question and their partings are done in an almost awkward fashion. 

Kageyama heads to the convenience store near his home because he's just too tired to prepare an actual meal - something decent like eggs over rice - and he doesn't want to worry about cleaning up a huge mess. Like most nights, he doubts he'll see his parents. He'll probably end up sleeping on the couch again anyway. 

The bell above the door jingles quietly and he's quick to nod at the elderly woman behind the cash register when she greets him. Walking up and down the aisle with no particular craving in mind, Kageyama thinks back to something Onaku mentioned during the team's final break, something said in passing as he helps to collect the balls so they can be used again. It wasn't impolite, really, but it hasn't left his mind once.

_"I like this new you."_

He sighs. "I'm trying to be a better me," Kageyama mumbles.

_For their sake and mine, too_.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter really dives into the "Child Neglect" tag which may result in additional tags for the story.  
> 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING  
> -child neglect  
> -child abuse (brief)

Kageyama remembers a time when his parents would smile at him - distantly, and more out of obligation, but a smile nonetheless - and ask about how his day at school went. He remembers a time when his father would pat his head after getting home from work before sending him off to play outside with his volleyball because he was busy. He remembers his mother waking him up in the morning with a decent breakfast after getting home way after he's gone to bed.

He remembers a time when he didn't mind being around his parents - even if things were mostly silent.

Halfway into his second year of middle school, things shifted horribly.

"You're home awfully late."

(" _Why are you home so late?!" His mother hisses under her breath._

_His father, blank-faced and jacket over his arm, merely responds with, "You know why."_

_Fury - unlike anything he has ever seen - appears on his mother's face._ )

Breathing in silently, practically tasting the tension in the air, Kageyama answers politely. "I stayed behind to help one of my teammates."

"Without expressed permission?"

Kageyama knows he's toeing a dangerous line. "You've...never cared before now." The loud scrab of a wooden chair across the tiled floor of the kitchen quickly follows and hurried steps make their way to the entrance. His mother appears in the doorway, long black hair held tightly in a bun via plain hair sticks. She's about a foot taller than him but with him bent down to remove his shoes, she seems so much taller. Gigantic. 

"Are you sassing me?" She demands. 

He blinks. "No."

"Then explain your answer!"

"Explain...my answer?"

The expression on her face darkens. "I will give you to the count of three to explain your answer!" She takes a step forward, he takes a step back. 

(" _13 years together and you let that whore invite you into her bed?!" He presses his hands over his ears harder, trying so hard to block out the yelling. "Explain yourself!"_

 _The sound of something heavy hits the wall outside his room. "I don't want to hear your hypocritical words. I've spent 13 miserable years here with you and you really wonder why?!" A loud thump right outside his door causes him to jump. "I can't do anything while_ he _ties us together, and you know it! Someone needs to be here for him and you volunteered."_

_"You didn't give me a choice!" A bitter, ugly sensation washes over him. "You think I want to be here with him?! You put me in the position!"_

_"You cling to him because you know he's the only reason I'm - "_

_He wonders when they'll realize he's been home from practice for over an hour._ )

Claws dig into his shoulder and he jerks back, a cry bursting out of his mouth. Kageyama tries to jerk away when the grip on his shoulder tightens. "Answer me now, Tobio. Why did you smart mouth me?" The pain worsens when she gives his shoulder a shake. He never liked her long fingernails. He never liked the way they _clacked_ against the wooden table in the kitchen; a sign of her impatience when things are not going her way. 

"You've never cared about how late I stayed before!" His lips tremble, eyes blinking rapidly to avoid crying. "I've b-been doing it for almost three years."

"No," she states sternly, "you haven't."

Kageyama nods slowly. Unsurely. "Yes, I have." 

Her nails relinquish his shoulder but his relief is short-lived. She's pinching his face - it's _painful_ \- to make him look up at her. "You will not backtalk me in my house. I feed you." _You just put money on the counter_. "I buy your clothes." _I'm wearing shorts I took from the 'lost and found' in the nurses' office_. "I give you a place to live." _I have nowhere else to go_. "You will treat me with respect. Do you understand?"

 _Let me go_. _Let me go_. _Letmegoletmegoletmego_ -

"Well?!"

"Yes, ma'am."

He breathes in deeply when she does let go and backs away. "Good." A calm expression appears on her face. "Go clean up. I'm making dinner and you will eat everything on your plate. Am I understood?" Nod. "Go."

Kageyama books it up the stairs - takes two at a time - and just barely keeps himself from slamming his bedroom door shut. The moment the soft click of his lock sounds off, hot trails appear on his cheeks. His shoulder _aches_. His face hurts. There's no way he can charge in the locker room with the others now. They'll be too curious and ask questions he won't be able to answer. Kageyama shifts a little and winces when the skin around his shoulder pulls.

With painstaking slowness, he removes his gym clothes and moves toward the mirror hanging on the outside of his closet. Just as he assumed, ugly bruises are forming over the skin of his shoulder. She had drawn blood and it makes him feel sick to his stomach. There are also twin marks of his face from where her nail pressed into his skin. Those won't be ignored. Even if he went digging in his mother's makeup after she left for work, their skin tones don't match.

(Dinner that night is nothing he likes. After he cleans up and his mother makes it clear that she won't be retiring soon, he calmly walks up the stairs and heads straight for the bathroom. Everything he ate today comes up almost as soon as he lifts the toilet lid, including the nasty mint tea served to him during dinner. He spends several minutes dry heaving before his stomach finally calms down enough for him to stand up and rinse out his mouth.

He tells her 'good night' from the top of the stairs and she doesn't return it.)

* * *

Kunimi observes Kageyama's form with silent, calculating eyes. Kageyama's game is so beyond off this morning that it's drawing attention from everyone else. He would go as far as to say 'sloppy.' Kageyama very clearly favors his left shoulder over his right and he's as silent and stiff as ever. Even his new buddying first year, Onaku, maintains a distance from the older boy. Though, anyone can see him continuously shoot worried looks to Kageyama. The small bruises around his mouth are eye-catching.

"Let's take a break."

Their captain is quick to pull Kageyama to the side. The discussion between them takes place on the other side of the gym, away from prying ears. Kageyama listens quietly and often averts his gaze to the floor. Kindaichi moves to stand next to him, handing him a towel in the process. Neither of them speaks as they blatantly stare. It's only when Kageyama violently flinches from a hand placed on his shoulder that Kunimi decides to say anything.

"Mark the date," he tells Kindaichi, "because I'm actually concerned for him." The dry tone destroys the cruel sentence. 

"He's jumpy."

"He doesn't want to be touched." _Not everyone likes to be touched._

Eyes wide, Kageyama backs away at something said to him. 'Please don't,' his lips read. Kageyama looks nervous. Their captain just looks more concerned before obviously sighing; relenting. They spend many more minutes talking, with Kageyama obviously putting some distance between them, and then their captain releases him from the discussion. Kageyama stands off to the side, gaze on the floor while he messes with the top of his water bottle. 

Kunimi turns to Kindaichi, expression blank. "Go talk to him."

"Why me?!"

"You spend all the time worrying about him and you won't even go talk to him?" Kunimi counters. 

Kindaichi sputters. "But you just said you were concerned about him?!"

Rolling his eyes, Kunimi nudges him with his shoulder. "Just go."

* * *

( _"I should take you out of volleyball." He tries not to flinch at her tone, eyes focused on his barely eaten food. "It's a waste of time and money," she continues. "You'll have - what - six or seven more years to play before you're facing the real world? You can't build a living off of some sport. You'll need to get a respectable job at some point because I won't be there to keep you above water. That is, of course, if you even manage to keep your grades up."_

_Kageyama moves food around on his plate. "I'm passing my classes."_

_She snorts. "You should be in the top percent of your grade. I was! I was a top student and class president. I had grades that would make those fancy American professors cry for." Pause. "You certainly get your 'smarts' from your father._

_The insult rolls over him like water._

_It's not the first she makes during dinner._ )

He glares at the ground.

 _Volleyball is the only thing I have_.

( _"It's the only thing I have," he mumbles. "I'm not really good at other things."_

_His mother rolls her eyes. "Obviously. I really should take you out of that club so you can focus more on your studies."_

_"It's the last term," Kageyama replies, face hopefully earnest. "Spring Interhigh. Please don't make me quit."_

_"Don't be so dramatic," she replies, eyes narrowed._

_His mouth snaps shut._ )

Someone sits next to him but his doesn't pay attention.

 _If she makes me quit, I'll have nothing until I start at Karasuno_.

"Are you...okay?"

He jumps. Kageyama glances up and is instantly confused. "What are you doing here?"

Kindaichi rolls his eyes. "We're at practice."

Now it's Kageyama's turn to roll his eyes. "Obviously. Why are you sitting next to me?"

"Am I not allowed too?"

"You wouldn't normally."

When Kindaichi hesitates to reply, Kageyama takes a drink from his water bottle.

" - you are."

Kageyama blinks. "What?"

"I wanted to...ask," he pauses for a moment to glance over his shoulder (Kageyama keeps himself from reacting at Kunimi's impassive face while he offers a thumbs up), "how you are?"

"So much struggle."

"Shut up," Kindaichi snaps.

For a moment, as brief as it is, Kageyama is instantly transported to his 13-year-old self. The younger version of himself that would playfully shove Kindaichi's shoulder when he's flustered or stumble over his words. It's so easy for these feelings of fond friendship to resurface after aggressively pushing them aside for over a year. Even though he tried to apologize twice, there has always been this longing to just...fix things as best he can. 

"So?" Kindaichi snaps.

Kageyama shrugs. "Hurt my shoulder. Can't play that well today. Nothing new."

"Oh, okay."

An awkward silence follows right after. He's frustrated because of what his mother said last night but he's not going to subject Kindaichi to his problems - _He won't care_. _I'm making a big deal out of nothing_. _She won't make me quit_. - and relieves him.

"You don't have to sit next to me."

"I," Kindaichi sighs. "Yeah, okay."

He gets up and moves away.

* * *

"I'm proud of you," Kunimi deadpans. "A true miracle."

Kindaichi doesn't reply but there's a pensive look on his face.  

Kunimi waits patiently for him to collect his thoughts.

"It was...like we were first years again." Kindaichi frowns. "I just beginning to realize..." He shakes his head.

"What were you going to say?"

Kindaichi shakes his head again. "Forget it."

But Kunimi _can't_.

"You were beginning to realize you miss being around Kageyama?"

Mouth dropping in surprise, Kindaichi stares at him.

"You think I didn't notice? Aside from Onaku, you're the only one to really express any sort of concern for his well-being." His taller friend takes an almost defensive stance. "I don't mean that in a bad way. It just surprises me."

"He's...trying. That's something, right?"

"He used to make you cry," Kunimi counters. He suddenly feels agitated. "He used to make you cry because you couldn't hit any ball he set. He made you doubt yourself as a player for a long time."

Kindaichi reacts as much as he expects. "Why are you so defensive?! You're the one that told me to go over there! You're the one who admitted being concerned!" All this is followed by a desperate look. "We have three months until the term ends and one month until the Spring Interhigh. I don't want to end my last year in middle school on a bad note."

"How oddly mature of you," Kunimi replies. "To be so forgiving."

"He's trying," Kindaichi repeats. "For whatever reason, he's trying. Can't we try too?"

Kunimi stares at him and then flickers his gaze to where Kageyama is finally speaking to Onaku. "I hate when you're the voice of reason."

"Who do you think I picked that up from?" 

* * *

"You're not staying late?" Onaku asks quietly when practice concludes. 

( _"You will come home right after practice ends."_

_He doesn't argue. "Yes, ma'am."_

_"Don't get smart with me, Tobio."_

_"I'm n - " but he stops. "Sorry."_ )

Kageyama shakes his head. "I have to go home and help my...mom with chores around the house." 

"Oh." Onaku glances at the floor in disappointment. "I understand."

"I'm sorry." He feels compelled to make things better. "We can try tomorrow."

"Senpai - "

"You're our reserved setter but you'll more than likely be the main setter next year. I want you to be ready."

Onaku nods. "Okay. Have a good evening."

"Good night." It's spoken to everyone. 

He receives a few responses. 

The walk home is as silent as ever. If this were any other night after leaving practice with Hinata, it would be filled with excited talk and provoked arguments (for fun). Hinata would walk with him until their roads split and they'd have promises to make the next day's practice better. He really misses Hinata (not that he'd ever say that out loud). When a gush of wind ruffles his hair, he stops to stare at the sky. There are a few stars and plenty of dark clouds.

 _It's going to rain_.

As if hearing his thought, the first drop hits his cheek. And then another. And another.  It downpours.

He makes a run for it.

"Don't track water throughout the house," is the first thing he hears upon entering his home. It's quickly followed by, "You're four minutes late."

 _Late_?

"Yes. Late."

"Oh," Kageyama mumbles. He didn't mean to say that out loud. "I'm sorry."

"I expect you to be home 15 minutes after your practice ends. It ends at 5:45. You should be here by 6."

"Every day?" He winces internally when her eyes narrow.

"Yes."

"But - "

"No 'buts,' Tobio. You'll do as I say!"

He argues. Desperate. "The Spring Interhigh is next month! I have to practice!"

"You don't have to do anything!"

"For God's sake, Kiko, let him stay late for practice. He's been doing it for a while now." Kageyama didn't even realize his father is home. The older man - a literal adult version of himself in every way except eye and hair color - walks into the area and pauses. "For the love of - let him go change! Do you want him to get sick?!"

His mother frowns. "I am _speaking_ \- "

"Tobio, go to your room and change."

Kageyama moves to take off his shoes but is not quick enough to escape the snake-like movement of his mother's hand. "I am _speaking_ to him."

"If he gets sick, you're taking him to the hospital."

"Of course," she snorts. "That's what I'm expected to do."

"Yes." His father looks annoyed. "You're also expected to let him put on dry clothes after being rained on. No wonder he was late."

An embarrassed flush claims his mother's cheeks. Her grip tightens but - thankfully - no pointy nails dig into his skin. "I was about - "

"No, you weren't," his father interrupts. "Being late shouldn't be a big deal at - "

"You know all about being late - "

" - isn't about me - "

" - that whore is late, isn't she?"

Kageyama has never seen his father look so angry. "Kiko, we've talked about this."

"You couldn't even be faithful to me - "

"Lets not discuss something we're both guilty of." That stops everything for a moment. Still soaking wet and shivering, Tobio unconsciously tugs on his arm. "Let him go, Kiko. He needs to change. I'm going to finish making dinner."

His mother scoffs but drops her hand. Kageyama holds it close to his chest, silently slips off his shoes with his toes, and waits until his mother is out of sight - storming off in a huffy rage - before turning to his father. In a matter of minutes, he seems to age. He seems so tired.

"After dinner, we need to talk." There's no room for argument in his tone so Kageyama only nods. "You have time to take a shower. Do that."

"Yes, sir."

Something like surprise flashes across the older man's face but Kageyama ignores it in favor of racing up the steps, just barely avoiding slipping on his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slowly, but surely, Kunimi is coming along.  
> The next chapter will be heavy with emotion.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter (sort of) addresses Cheating and Bad Parenting (but not in a way that may satisfy some readers).

Dinner is far too tense.

Kageyama barely spares his mother a glance while shooting obviously nervous looks towards his father. Neither of his parents has spoken beyond a few words, the customary 'thank you' before every meal, and he catches his father glaring at anything that isn't him. Specifically. Even though his shower helped, Kageyama can't help but sniffle a few times throughout the course of the meal. He hopes that he doesn't get sick - not when prelims are just around the corner. 

"There's medicine in the cabinet near the stove," his father breaks the silence. "Go get it, Tobio. Take two."

Knowing that he is being given the opportunity to escape briefly, he all but flies out of his seat and makes for the kitchen in hurried steps. He just barely makes out " - scare him, Kiko," before he's too far in the kitchen to hear anymore more of a conversation he's clearly not wanted to be present for. Kageyama locates the cabinet and opens it. There's an assortment of over the counter and prescribed pills arranged by use.

He's quick to grab two from a small white bottle that reads nonsense about congestion and sinus pressure. Just as he's opening the fridge to grab an unopened bottle of water, the voices of his parents raise. Not exactly screaming but noticeably going that way. Kageyama shuts the fridge and listens; the words make him feel as if someone is slowly peeling his skin from his body - it _hurts_ to hear such disgust in his mother's voice when she talks about him.

"He's not a _child_ , Hakaru! Stop _babying_ him!"

The sound of someone throwing their metal chopsticks down quickly follows. "That's exactly what he is! A _child_. Kiko, he's barely 15-years-old. He has needs that need to be met. Why can't you understand - "

"Needs? I _provide_ for him!"

"You certainly couldn't provide him a basic greeting when he got home and - 

"He was late!"

Kageyama backs up until his back hits the counter, eyes wide. 

"By a few minutes! That happens!"

It's a screaming match now. He covers his ears, hands pressing hard enough to ache, but it can't block out the snarls from his mother or the shouting from his father. It can't block out the distaste he hears in both of their voices (for him, for each other, he doesn't know anymore) nor the way porcelain dishes are roughly handled. The loud scrap of wooden chairs against the floor quickly follows. Kageyama just wants to go to his room and pretend today didn't happen at all. 

"If you felt the need to discipline him, you could have waited until _after_ he's in dry clothes. For God's sake, Kiko, he's probably going to wake up tomorrow with a cold. What if he's too unwell to go to school?!"

Kageyama feels trapped. If he stays in the kitchen, he'll be subjected to their yelling. If he leaves the kitchen, he'll be directly faced with their argument. Lowering his hands, he gulps (breathe in, breathe out) and moves towards the doorway that connects the kitchen to the dining room. 

"Do you expect me to miss a day at - "

"Of course not." Kageyama has never heard such disdain in his father's voice before. "I would. You're free to do whatever you want, Kiko."

Heavy stomping can be heard followed by the front door opening and slamming shut. The roar of a car engine can be heard from outside and then complete and utter silence. Silence, of which, lasts barely a minute.

"Tobio," the tone is purposefully calm, "you can come out now."

Kageyama, too uncomfortable to disobey, shuffles into the dining room and stares at the table. His mother's chair is pushed back a dramatic length, her plate of food is an utter mess, and her cup knocked over. His own plate and that of his father's remain clear and mostly untouched. He glances up at his father and remains silent. Kageyama Hakaru is not a man of many words unless angered. Kageyama can see the barest tremble to his laced fingers from where they rest on the table. 

"I'm sorry you heard all of that," he is told when the silence following his re-entry draws on uncomfortably. "Your mother...has a few issues she needs to work out."

Nodding, Kageyama retakes his seat but he doesn't attempt to eat at all.

"I didn't mean it." He asks quietly. "I didn't mean to be late. It was an accident. I'm sorry."

His father regards him quietly, intense eyes roaming over his face before he sighs. "You did nothing wrong, Tobio."

"Then why is she so angry with me?!" He can't fight off the hurt (physical, mental) he's felt since returning home to see her in the house. "I didn't mean it," Kageyama repeats. "Is it because she had to come to my school?"

Frowning, his father leans forward. "When did she go to your school? Why did she go to your school?"

Kageyama flushes. Embarrassment sweeps in. "I...had a panic attack and the dean called her to the school. About two weeks ago, I think. She was wearing her business suit."

"I wasn't aware of this."

"Oh," he looks down at the cold food on his plate. 

"What...caused you to have a panic attack?"

His flush returns full-force. He had told the teachers, the nurse, and the dean that he was just stressed about barely passing his classes coupled with the Spring Interhigh just around the corner and that he just needs time to adjust, to get past Spring Interhigh. Given that his mother wants him to quit volleyball, he knows his stress will only double if he is forced to quit. 

"Tobio?"

"Stress. I'm struggling with my classes."

"Is volleyball too distracting for you?" His father asks. 

Unlike his mother, his father's voice remains calm and even borders on concern. 

"Please, don't make me quit." If he pleads now; maybe his father will be sympathetic. "I'm trying."

"I'm not going to make you quit." Relief fills him instantly. "However," Kageyama's eyes snap to him, "I think it would be best to hire you a tutor. If you intend to make a career out of this in the future, you need to at least pass all your classes. I'm not asking for you to be perfect or top of your class, but you should be meeting the minimum requirements for each class."

Kageyama fiddles with the bottom of his shirt, just under the table. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. I just want you to succeed at a pace that allows you to do so."

"Okay."

Finally, Kageyama reaches for his cup. The tea is cold but he doesn't care. It's still a much better choice to the tea he was served by his mother a mere couple of days ago. "There are things we need to discuss and I know - I _know_ \- that if I don't do this now, it may never be done. Or worse, your mother will get to it before me and warp things beyond what the are."

"Okay."

Rubbing his temples, his father shifts in his seat. "By now...you have noticed that there's a great deal of tension between your mother and me." _No kidding_. "Our marriage was an arrangement between our parents because - "

" - she ended up pregnant with me. I know."

A heavy sigh shortly follows. "...Yes. Your grandparents from my side of the family are incredibly traditional. Even if a marriage doesn't work out physically or affectionately, both parents need to be present within the life of their child."

Kageyama's gaze flickers to the table.

"And I'm well aware that I failed that second aspect." The sound of a plate being pushed forward sounds off. "I haven't played an active roll in your life, Tobio, and it's not fair to you. For a long time, I haven't cared about what your mother does with whomever or where she goes because at least she would be here when it mattered. At least one of us would uphold the role of a parent. Recently, however, things have become quite tense between us and we're both guilty of - "

"Is it true?" Kageyama licks his suddenly dry lips. "Are you cheating on her?"

He's 15. He's not _stupid_.

"I am seeing another woman."

"Would she be happy if you stopped?"

Something - perhaps annoyance - flashes across his father's face. "She hasn't been happy with me for a long time. Long before I started seeing this other woman. Even if I were to stop, she wouldn't be satisfied. She'll continue to do as I do and we will accomplish nothing. And I..." Kageyama watches him hesitate before continuing, "...don't want to stop seeing this other woman."

"It's not...right."

Silence, and then - "It's not."

"And what she's doing - the same thing - isn't right either."

"Tobio - "

"Can't you too just...make-up?"

"You can't make-up over something that had no real foundation, to begin with."

Kageyama blinks, eyes suddenly burning with tears but he refuses to let them fall. "I wish you two weren't together just for me then! You're both so unhappy and I - and I - I hate it!" He's on his feet, hands slammed down on the table. The look of shock at the outburst is the final crack in the dam blocking his tears. "I hate it," he sobs. "I hate it. I hate this. I hate seeing or hearing you two fight. I hate coming home to an empty house. I hate not being able to talk to either of you. I hate being by myself or alone with just her. I h-hate it so much!"

He's crying so hard and he thinks it's not just because of the messed up situation involving his parents but also the stress of class, of not being with _his_ team at Karasuno, of missing people that he won't meet for a long time. 

The last time his father hugged him, he cannot recall. But still, he's pulled into a hug, lowered to the floor, and blacks out to the same two words repeated over and over again.

"I'm sorry."

* * *

**[Father 07:45]:** I'll begin looking for a tutor for you today. 

 **[Father 07:45]:** You can make it through today.

 **[Father 07:46]:** I will see you at home just after 7.

Kageyama freezes upon the last message. He's barely managing a reply when another text appears.

 **[Father 07:47]:** If you want to stay late.

 **[Me 07:49]:** I do

 **[Me 07:49]:** Thank you

 **[Father 07:50]:** Have a good day, Tobio.

 **[Me 07:50]:** You to

Putting his phone away, Kageyama sets about getting dressed. The practice has ended a little bit early today - something that happens occasionally - and he decided to not keep going himself. Last night had been physically and emotionally draining. Not just from the confession his father gave him but also the argument that broke out once his mother returned (just barely before midnight). He remembers hearing his father tell his mother to "Calm done. Tobio is trying to sleep. We can discuss this civilly."

His mother wasn't in the mood to accommodate him.

There was more yelling.

Things were thrown around.

Nearing 2 AM, the argument settles and everything falls silent. His door was opened, his father's head sticking inside, and he apologizes for the noise. When Kageyama was preparing to leave this morning, he noticed a broken chair and that the single picture of him near the door is missing. His parents are already gone but there was a note on the table for him to eat the pre-made breakfast in the fridge. 

For the first time in a long time, he goes to school without eating cereal for breakfast. 

"Senpai, you seem to be in a better mood."

Kageyama blinks, coming back to himself, and turns to Onaku with a curious gaze.

"You're humming," the first yeat declares delightfully. "It sounds nice."

Blushing, Kageyama quickly finishes putting on his school uniform. "I don't hum."

Not to be deterred, Onaku just nods. "You do. It's okay. As I said, it sounds nice."

"You're a weird boy," he replies.

Onaku grins. "That's what all my friends say~ They think I'm too obsessed with volleyball." Kageyama picks up his bag and heads for the door, Onaku trailing after him to keep speaking. "By the way, senpai, are you staying late tonight?"

"Until 6:30," he confirms. "You need to practice setting from different positions all over the court."

"Aren't setters usually up by the net?"

Kageyama thinks about his backcourt sets against certain rival teams and just snorts. "You never know." He pauses by the door leading out of the club room. "Are you up to it?"

"Yes," Onaku salutes enthusiastically.

* * *

"Have either of you worked on some ideas for the project?" Antoya asks when the class is placed in their groups again.

Kindaichi blinks, shocked. "I, um, completely forgot about that. Sorry." He ends sheepishly. 

"Yes."

Both turn to Kageyama. He ducks his head down, face turning red. "You can, uh, look at them." Because Kindaichi is closer, he hands him his notebook. Antoya moves closer to read what is written, making soft noises as he goes. Kindaichi's eyes widen as he reads along. It's just lyrics. Parts of unfinished poems. Thoughts that trail off into nothing. There's no connection between them but there is one that really sticks out and he can't help but feel it's directed towards him. 

_from a distance_

_no words spoken_

_where and why_

_How_

_too far away_

_a missing shadow_

_No_

_missing shadows_

_the court is empty_

"Can you explain this?" Antoya asks while pointing to the exact poem that strikes something deep in Kindaichi's gut. "It seems...direct."

"Self-awareness," Kageyama answers carefully.

It's spoken honestly. 

"Self-awareness?" Antoya pushes more. "About what?"

Kageyama glances at Kindaichi before his eyes flicker to his wristband - almost the same exact color of Aoba Johsai's school color(s) - and sighs. "For a while, I...wasn't the best person to be around. I'm still trying to learn how to be a...better person. It's slow."

 _Is this about me_?! Kindaichi wants to desperately know. _Akira and me_?! _Tell me_! But he doesn't demand answers. He sits there silently, avoiding eye contact while handing back the notebook. Kageyama's fingers brush against his and it takes everything within him to not jerk away. 

"That could be a start," Antoya states. "Like telling a story. That can be the start or what leads into the middle. What do you guys think?"

Kageyama shrugs. "S'fine."

Kindaichi stiffly nods.

Class ends with haltered talk between them. Antoya's annoyance is apparent due to his and Kageyama's lack of speaking. He sighs and roughly fixes his desk. Ignoring him, Kindaichi watches Kageyama out of the corner of his eye, to see his reaction, but Kageyama just moves his desk back into the right position and nods along to whatever Antoya manages to get out before the bells chime and class is over.

Following after Kageyama, Kindaichi has to speed walk to keep up with the boy.

"Kageyama!" He calls out. Now is the time to discuss whatever happened in class. It's lunch break. "Wait!"

He does the exact opposite.

Kageyama practically breaks out into a run and Kindaichi gives chase. They probably look like a bunch of idiots to the student body but he doesn't care. His burning desire (manageable in class) to know what the hell happened in class, and to address the change in Kageyama, keeps him going. They're outside before he knows. Racing across the courtyard. Kageyama is heading toward the gym - no, _behind_ the gym.

"Just wait!" He hollers when Kageyama disappears behind the corner.  

He rounds the corner and stops.

Kageyama is on the ground, Kunimi directly across from them. Judging by the pained expressions on both their faces, Kageyama ran into him full-force.

"Don't run," Kindaichi manages through his heavy breathing. "Just. Don't."

What would have once made him smirk in triumph only made him feel guilty when Kageyama flinches back as he reaches out with his hand to help him up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 324, the conclusion of the Battle at the Trash Heap, was brilliant.  
> I'm so proud of Karasuno and Nekoma.


	7. Chapter 7

Kunimi gets to his feet slowly, eyes glancing between Kageyama and Kindaichi before staying on Kageyama. Kageyama isn't looking at him, though, but looking at Kindaichi's outstretched hand like it would bite him. His hands, Kunimi notices, are trembling as he clutches the grass beneath them. This Kageyama is so unlike the boy he had known for the better part of his middle school life. This Kageyama is different from the Kageyama he saw at the beginning of the year. This Kageyama isn't full of overwhelming confidence or unfiltered anger. 

This frightened, shaking Kageyama is something he _doesn't_ like.

"Let him help you up," Kunimi states when the silence draws on. "And don't run off."

He doesn't know Kindaichi's plan but he didn't expect the confrontation to be like this.

Kageyama's eyes snap towards him - wide and ocean blue - before he gets up on his own, brushing himself off as he does. Thankfully, as Kindaichi's shoulder's sag in relief, he doesn't run off. However, there's a clear amount of distance he's putting between them. Kunimi has seen him scan the area for the best exits twice. He wouldn't chase after him if Kageyama made a run for it but Kindaichi - often as stubborn as Kageyama - would definitely give chase.

"That poem," Kindaichi starts to say (Kageyama looks at the ground), "that was about us, right? The team?"

"It's just a poem," Kageyama answers. "Just ideas so we can start on our project. You don't have to interpret them any one way."

Kindaichi huffs, annoyed, before shaking his head. "It's deliberate. I can tell. Especially that talk of self-awareness or whatever. You're talking about the team and - "

"Can't you just drop it," Kageyama snaps suddenly. "I was just trying to write what was on my mind."

"It means something," Kindaichi presses.

Kunimi stares at his friend. What poem could possibly convince him to chase Kageyama across the school? Why is it so important? He knows about the group project and the possible topics of said project but something involving Kageyama shouldn't have him this upset (unless it's volleyball related). 

Kageyama stares, unblinkingly at both of them, and then looks up at the sky as if it can provide him assistance with this confrontation. 

"Kage - "

"King of the Court." Kunimi blinks, surprised this is even being brought up. Kindaichi jerks back as if slapped. "That's what everyone calls me, right? The 'king' or the 'tyrant' or whatever. I don't get along with anyone and I'm bossy. I'm never satisfied and I keep pushing everyone past their breaking point. I know I'm not a good person but I'm trying to be. It's obviously too late for you two or the rest of the third-years."

"You've given up on us," Kunimi states.

His chest suddenly feels hallow.

"Yeah," Kageyama responds with a seemingly casual hug, "I have."

* * *

He tries to blink indifferent eyes at both of them but a gross feeling washes over him. He wonders, briefly, if his own face looked as devastated as Kindaichi's does at the moment after being told they never friends following the practice match between Karasuno and Aoba Johsai. Last night made him realize just how tired he is of a lot of things. He just wants to make it through the Spring Interhigh (they didn't win nationals so what's the point of hoping this time) and move on to Karasuno. 

By then, maybe his parents will have settled their spat and he can be with Hinata (earning their recognition among old rivals and new ones).

Well, Hinata and the others. 

"Besides," Kageyama continues in what he hopes will be the final nail on the coffin of whatever this awkward thing between the three of them is, "we were never friends." He watches, face carefully blank, as Kindaichi turns away to wipe at his face with his sleeve. Kunimi stares, face not betraying any thought he may have. It's always been hard to figure out what's going on in Kunimi's head.

"Fine," Kindaichi snarls, eyes red and fists clenched. "To hell with new begin- _nings_!" His voice cracks on the last word. "We'll get through the project and only speak to each other when we need too." He turns and storms away.

Kageyama watches him go.

"You have a cold heart."

Despite nodding, Kageyama still replies. "Yeah, but you know all about being cold-hearted. After all," he turns on his heel, "you're the one that started calling me 'king' anyway. Everyone else picked it up from you." 

Kunimi stares at him. "We haven't called you that in a while. No one has."

"But it's still there," Kageyama responds, "in the back of your mind, right? I'll never be 'right' in your eyes. Or his. Just like you both think you'll never be 'right' in my eyes."

"You're making assumptions," Kunimi's face is still so (irritatingly) blank but his tone borders on agitation. "We were giving you a chance to prove you changed for the better."

"I can't be around you without being an outsider," Kageyama instantly replies. "And yes," he continues when Kunimi opens his mouth to speak, "I know it's my fault. I know this. I know. Why do you think I'm trying to work on being better?! I can change. Even if it's too late for you two. At least I can be better in the future."

For a moment, neither of them speak. 

Kunimi breaks the tense moment with a question that almost makes Kageyama back down, almost makes him retract everything he said so far. "Would it satisfy you if we hated you completely?"

 _No_. "Maybe."

"I don't understand you," Kunimi's monotone voice is _irritating_. "Once upon a time, I never would have guessed you'd give up. On anything."

Kageyama shakes his head. "I'm moving on. After middle school, you won't ever have to bother with me again unless we're on opposite sides of the court."

 _I thought my main goal was to earn your friendship, but three months is not enough_. _I want to be at Karasuno_. _I want to be with Hinata_.

"See you at practice," he ends their conversation there.

* * *

"Don't cry over him," Kunimi tells Kindaichi after finding him in the bathroom. "You've cried enough over him."

Kindaichi takes the tissue from his outstretched hand. "Easy for you to say. You just don't cry." He blows his nose. Loudly. "I hate this. I hate this so much. God, this is my fault."

"No," Kunimi pats his slumped form on the back, head bowed. "It's the fault of all three of us."

* * *

"I thought you three were doing better," Captain Tachi states by way of greeting, exactly two weeks before the Spring Interhigh. "But it's as if everything has reverted back to the beginning of the school year."

When Kindaichi doesn't respond, Kunimi steps in. "Kageyama has made his feelings about the two of us very clear. We will be civil with each other, we will work as a team, but there's no friendship to be had."

Disappointment flashes across their captain's face, but Kunimi doesn't know what else to say. "I'm not happy about this, but I have no choice but to accept it. We're so close to the Spring Interhigh and they'll be releasing the list of matches Friday night." 

 _We're not happy about this either_.

"Yes, sir." 

The moment they're left alone in the locker room, Kindaichi's intense expression crumbles. "I thought we were going to be okay. We were giving him a chance. What made him give up so easily?" He shakes his head. "I don't understand."

Kunimi sighs. "I - " _I told you to leave it alone_. _I told you not to pursue this_. "I don't either. Let's just try and make it through the Spring Interhigh. I overheard Tachi-san speaking with the coach. Oikawa-senpai and Iwaizumi-senpai are visiting on Friday." 

"Maybe they'll kick Kageyama's ass into gear."

 _I doubt it_. "Maybe."

The door to the locker room opens and he can see Kindaichi freeze after glancing over his shoulder. 

"That's not what I meant," Kageyama states quietly into his phone - it's clear he hasn't seen them yet - and places his gym bag unto an unoccupied bench. "I just - yes, ma'am. I'm sorry." His body language can be read as distraught. "Please don't make me do this. He said I - " He stops abruptly, facing the lockers. "Yes, ma'am." There's something _wrong_ about how defeated Kageyama sounds. "I understand. I will...let my captain and the coach know."

The call ends after a polite 'good-bye' and Kageyama's arm falls, his cell phone hangs limply in his hand.

Kindaichi shifts, his shoes accidentally scruffing against the tiled floor. Kageyama's head snaps in their direction. Eyes wet, his stares at them. "Kindaichi," he acknowledges, there's a tremble in his voice. "Kunimi. About earlier, I'm sorry." Abrupt. He lifts his bag up, secures it over his shoulder, and turns to leave. "Looks like you won't have to deal with me anymore. Period."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kindaichi asks, irritated. 

"Exactly what it means."

Kageyama walks out of the locker room without looking back.

* * *

"Where's Kageyama-senpai?" Onaku asks when practice starts and there's no sign of the tall setter. "I saw him earlier."

Coach Mimuzo and Captain Tachi share a look. Coach Mimuzo looks unhappy while Captain Tachi looks as if all his dreams have been crushed beneath a boot.

"As of today, Kageyama is no longer playing on our team," Coach Mimuzo answers. "Due to unfortunate circumstances. Onaku," the first year jumps, "you are now the main setter. Today, you will practice setting for the regulars as you are now a regular."

Instead of lighting up at the news, Onaku sucks in a shaky breath and nods. His eyes are wet with disbelief, but his soldiers on. "Y-Yes, coach."

"What the fuck?!" Kindaichi whispers. Be it acknowledged or ignored, no one responds to it.

Kunimi stares at the ground, incapable of describing what he feels.

Practice goes as usual but no one can deny the space left behind via Kageyama. Onaku tries so hard to fill it but his slumped shoulders and dejected expression make it incredibly difficult. Kindaichi _can_ spike Onaku's tosses but remains silently angry that Kageyama isn't there - Why? He can't deny that he knows why. No doubt Kunimi's glances indicate that he knows why as well.

"It feels wrong," Kindaichi states when they're the only ones left in the locker. 

"I never thought I would miss Kageyama's presence on the court," Kunimi replies.

( _"You'll let me toss for you, right?" Kageyama asks when he picks up a spare volleyball from the cart._

_Kunimi yawns. "I'm too tired to spike right now. Ask Yuutarou when he gets here."_

_"Come on," Kageyama laughs. "Just a few times. I promise we'll stop in a bit."_

_Kindaichi suddenly bursts into the gym. "I passed my English exam!" He throws his things to the ground. "Toss for me! I deserve it!"_

_"Thank goodness," Kunimi mumbles and Kageyama laughs again._ )

Kindaichi glares at the ground. "Let's stop at the convenience store. I want to pick up more of those Bang Bang energy drinks."

"They'll keep you up at night," Kunimi answers in hopes that the conversation about Kageyama will be dropped for now.

* * *

Kageyama is seen around school by different team members (obviously by Kindaichi as well but he remains surprised when he's not confronted about quitting). He doesn't greet any of them in passing and reverts back to not speaking to anyone unless spoken to. Twice, he has been confronted by a sobbing Onaku. Twice, he has turned away the crying first-year.

 _I didn't want them to hate me_ , he thinks of Onaku and the other first-years, _but I don't have a choice anymore_.

His home life has escalated to a nearly unbearable tension. Screams fill the night of his unhappy home. His mother's words fill his head - useless, wasteful, _stupid_ \- while his father tries to maintain order (it's becoming difficult for him to _not_ raise his voice in return). Dinner is eaten alone or with his father. He's grateful for the daily distractions of school but can't stand to be home. He can't stand to be there by himself when she's there. His father makes it bearable (when he's home himself) - but only for an hour or two.

"I can't stand seeing you so miserable," he's told Thursday night, barely an hour after his mother leaves for a weekend business trip in Kyoto. "I want you to start going back to volleyball practice, Tobio."

"I quit," he responds quietly. "I can't go back."

"Or won't?" His father asks. 

Kageyama looks down. "My team was just barely starting to tolerate me because I wasn't...a good teammate before. I just want to finish middle school. I'll start playing again in high school."

"What she said to you isn't true, Tobio." Placing dinner in front of him, his father sits across from him and laces his fingers together in front of him. "Volleyball isn't a waste of time. We talked about how it does affect your grades but that's going to be handled soon enough. I know you miss playing even if it's only been a few days. Go to tomorrow's practice."

"No," Kageyama answers. "I don't want to."

"You do."

"I don't."

"Don't give up like this, Tobio."

He shrugs. "I just want to finish middle school." 

His father sighs. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I wish she - " He stops and shakes his head. "It's been one step forward and five steps back these days."

"I just want you two to stop fighting," Kageyama answers. "I don't like the yelling."

"I don't like yelling, Tobio." 

* * *

"Yoohoo~"

The door to Kitagawa Daiichi's gym is thrown open and there, dressed in the traditional Seijoh tracksuit, stands Oikawa Tooru and Iwaizumi Hajime. Kunimi stares at them, taking in the height of his former captain (and lack of height with his former ace) and the way they so clearly dominate the atmosphere, before nudging a silent Kindaichi to get up and bow along with their teammates. Despite being silent and stone-faced most days, Kindaichi does return the small smile sent his way by Iwaizumi.

"Thank you for being here," Captain Tachi states when the first-years settle down, many standing off to the side when the high schoolers draw near. "We understand that this takes away from your own practice and appreciate any guidance you share before next week."

"Of course, of course," Oikawa glances around, acknowledges Kunimi and Kindaichi with small nods, before frowning just a bit. "Are you all looking forward to the Spring Interhigh?"

"Yes, sir." The collective shout brings a fleeting satisfied look to Oikawa's face.

"What have you been focusing on at the moment?" Iwaizumi steps in, his eyes also scanning the present team members.

Kindaichi's sigh can almost be considered loud. "They're looking for Kageyama," he whispers to his friend.

"I know," Kunimi nods. "I wonder who's going to tell them. It'll probably be us."

Onaku, upset with his situation but brave that he is, approaches. "Hello, Oikawa-senpai." The lack of enthusiasm is apparent. "My name is Onaku Takeshin. I am," his breath hitches, "the current m-main setter. Ka - The former setter of our team has t-told me a lot about you and I've seen plenty of videos about you. I hope I can learn a lot from you during our short time together." 

Oikawa's face is unreadable for a moment before a wide grin spreads across it. "Aw, you're so cute! Isn't he cute, Iwa-chan?" Iwaizumi rolls his eyes. "Onaku-chan, I'd be glad to demonstrate a few things for you today. Even my jump serve, if you'd like~"

"I would appreciate it, senpai." Onaku backs away. 

As they expected, Iwaizumi targets them directly when the team is split into small groups. Kunimi steps forward when Iwaizumi stops in front of him and Kunimi. "Hello, Iwaizumi-senpai."

Iwaizumi stares at both of them, looks around the gym, and sighs. "Alright. What happened?"

"Senpai?" Kunimi asks, voice ever monotone.

"Where's the excitement?" Iwaizumi asks. "The Spring Interhigh is _next week_. Matches are announced tonight. Also," he leans in, "where is Kageyama?"

"The excitement walked out the door with Kageyama," Kindaichi answers. He's kneeling on the floor to fix his shoelaces, tying them roughly with exaggerated movements.

"He quit," Kunimi supplies when he sees the confusion. "On Monday. He hasn't been here since."

"Why?"

Kindaichi's stands up straight and scowls. "No one knows. We were just told it was because of 'unfortunate circumstances' or whatever."

"I - "

"Can we practice spiking, senpai?" Kindaichi interrupts.  

Iwaizumi looks back and forth between both of them before nodding, clearly unhappy. His body language is apparent; the discussion won't be dropped for long. "Sure. Whatever you want."

"Thanks, senpai."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not 100% satisfied with this chapter but if I don't post it now, it won't be posted for a long time. Just keep in mind that there will be an eventual happy ending to this fic. Also, I'm happy to finally have Oikawa and Iwaizumi integrated into this fic.


	8. Chapter 8

"What did you find out?" Oikawa asks when Iwaizumi returns to his side. They're standing to the left side of the gym, observing from a distance so they can critique the team effectively so they have an opportunity to fix mistakes within the week leading up to the Spring Interhigh. "Sleepy-chan and Kin-chan don't seem very happy today. None of them do." He steps forward to catch a stray ball and tosses it back with an encouraging smile.

Iwaizumi pinches the bridge of his nose briefly, a headache starting to develop. "Kageyama quit the team. The only explanation anyone has received is that it was due to 'unfortunate circumstances.'" He sends a brief smile to a first-year that attempts - and misses - a ball set to him.

"Do you think it's serious?" 

"Maybe," Iwaizumi replies. "Can you really picture Kageyama abandoning the team for the hell of it? He doesn't seem the type."

Oikawa scans the gym before sighing, frustrated. "They need him, Iwa-chan. Onaku-chan is doing okay but he won't be ready for the tournament next week. His timing is nowhere near Tobio-chan's and he hesitates too much. They have no hope for nationals without Tobio-chan." He keeps his face from souring at potentially giving Kageyama a compliment. 

"Agreed." Iwaizumi jumps up to catch a stray ball that would have otherwise flown over his head and tosses it back to a stammering second-year. "At least..." he trails off. "Well, at least things were going better from what I heard. Regardless."

"Word gets around, Iwa-chan." Oikawa backs away when the current captain dives for the ball to keep it in play (and grins when he succeeds). "Tobio-chan had some sort of panic attack last month and that caused an abrupt mood change. I can barely remember the last time someone referred to him as 'king' and that can be...telling. So what," he glances around the gym, taking in the dejected forms of Kitagawa Daiichi's regulars, "could possibly cause him to quit? No doubt he'd be here with a broken wrist if it meant he could practice."

Iwaizumi snorts. "No shit," he says in a 'I-just-said-that' tone. "He gets that from you, ya' know?"

"Not true," Oikawa replies automatically. At Iwaizumi's expression following that, he elaborates. "I haven't been around him long enough for him to pick up habits from me."

"He followed you around for nearly an entire year and stayed after practice when you stayed after practice - "

"Iwa-chan - "

" - and even when you did your best to push him away, he was still there. Even after that one time you freaked out."

Oikawa looks down at his feet. "I don't think he even noticed what was going on that time."

"Oi!" Iwaizumi bumps his shoulder. "You should still try to apologize to him at some point; even if he wasn't aware of the situation."

"God, Iwa-chan. You sound like my mom."

A loud smack followed by a heavy thump stops Iwaizumi from replying. "Kindaichi-senpai!" Onaku's loud, panicked cry draws the attention of everyone. Other team members are forming a circle on the other side of the net. Both the captain and the coach hurry over to the group, quickly followed by Seijoh high schoolers, and the group parts slowly to make room. 

On the floor clutching his shoulder is Kindaichi. Kneeling next to him is Kunimi who, with a surprisingly alert expression, is poking around his exposed shoulder with one hand while holding up the short sleeve of his shirt with his other hand. There's a bit of redness but no bruises seen nor automatic swelling. Onaku is standing a few feet away, trembling hands up in panic. 

"What happened?" Captain Tachi asks.

"The ball went too high and - "

" - I jumped for the ball but I didn't raise my arm properly." Kindaichi cuts in, gaze on the floor. "The impact hurt my shoulder. I'll be fine in a few minutes."

Iwaizumi sighs quietly. "One bad thing after another."

"Kin-chan," Oikawa moves past the middle schoolers, "come sit with me for a little bit." Coach Mimuzo nods, eyes flickering between the two of them.

"I - yes, senpai." Kindaichi gets up slowly.

Oikawa looks to Iwaizumi as the group disperses and motions to his knee. It's starting to ache. Iwaizumi's eyes narrow. Oikawa knows he needs to take it easy and sit down for a bit, too much strain will not be good in the long run. Kunimi stands next Kindaichi, hand on his arm. They are communicating silently, Kunimi's eyes occasionally flickering over to them. Whatever conclusion they come to, Kindaichi sighs and nods.

* * *

"I'm sure you know what I want to talk about," Oikawa starts when they sit on the bench.

Kindaichi looks on as his teammates play a three-on-three match while others stand off to the side with Iwaizumi. "I don't know what to tell you, senpai. About Kageyama, I mean. He's been okay for about a month. Considerate, even. Nice, I guess. But we - me and Akira - noticed a different sort of distance he was placing between us. I thought," he clenches the material of his shorts, "we were gonna' be okay. He wasn't demanding anymore and he wasn't yelling. Sometimes..." He trails off.

"Sometimes?" Oikawa repeats in a subtle attempt to get him to continue.

"Sometimes I think he only took an interest in Onaku, worked with him, just so he could quit later. After his meltdown, he completely changed. It was like he didn't know any of us," Kindaichi gestures to the other members of Kitagawa Daiichi's volleyball team, "anymore. Sometimes it's like he's practicing with some invisible person. He would start saying a name, I think, and then catch himself."

Oikawa hums. Kindaichi watches him absentmindedly rub his knee. "What do you think caused his panic attack?"

"He fell asleep in class and the teacher woke him up. He panicked immediately after, grabbing his things and racing out of the classroom. I heard he was found under one of the staircases and it took two teachers to get him to the nurses' office." Kindaichi blinks. He didn't answer the question and quickly amends that. "I don't know why he freaked out. No one knows and I doubt he'll tell anyone."

He listens to the sound of Oikawa cracking his neck and tries not to wince. "How does your shoulder feel, Kin-chan?" 

_Are we done talking about Kageyama_?

With caution, Kindaichi rotates his shoulder. There's a slight _twing_ of pain but it settles quickly. "I should be okay soon."

"That's good."

"Yeah."

"You said," Oikawa starts quietly just as Iwaizumi joins the three-on-three match, replacing a second-year regular, "that you thought things were going better between you and Tobio-chan. What did you mean?"

Kindaichi catches the eye of Kunimi and returns his blank gaze. "Talking...was better. During practice and in classes. Not perfect but it wasn't, like, super awkward. Don't get me wrong, a lot of it was awkward but it didn't feel like he was projecting his bad attitude. But then a few days ago, things just...came to a halt?" Kindaichi releases a frustrated sigh. "We're in a group project together to write a poem. He came up with some examples but one of them really stuck out to me."

"And what was it?"

"It was about us. Me and Akira, I mean, and the team. I asked him about it and he talked about 'self-awareness' and, uh, it escalated after class was over."

Oikawa raises an eyebrow. "Escalated?"

"I may have sort of, um, chased him through the school to confront him..."

Instead of laughing as he assumed his senior would, Oikawa's eyes narrow. "You chased him through the school?"

"Um, yes?"

"Kin-chan," Oikawa heaves a sigh, his disappointment clear. "While I can't help but admire your persistence to confront Tobio-chan, that's not the way to approach someone who hasn't been himself, so to speak, and demand answers. How did you even get him to stop? _You_ did manage to confront him, right?"

"He ran straight into Akira," Kindaichi answers, eyes on his shoes. "Literally, I mean. It sent them both to the ground. Kunimi sort of convinced him to listen to me. Well, my questions. I just asked about the poem. Kageyama...said things."

"Things?"

Kindaichi looks at him. "He talked at being called 'King of the Court' and about how he acted for the last year and a half. He said he's trying to be a better person but told us - Akira and me - that he was too late to convince us and the other third-years that he changed. Akira asked him if he gave up on us..." His eyes start to sting.

"And Tobio-chan said yes."

"Yes!" The word bursts from his mouth. "And he acted like it wasn't a problem!"

A thoughtful hum follows from Oikawa. "And it _is_ a problem, Kin-chan?"

* * *

He patiently waits for Kindaichi to organize his thoughts. He can feel eyes on him, the sensation leaving him concerned. Regardless, his curiosity about the situation between his three kouhai has tripled since the grapevine brought out Kageyama's ~~unfortunate~~ title and his dictator-like attitude on the court. "King of the Court" could have been a great title for a prodigy setter, _for_ Kageyama, if the backstory was nice. _Appealing_. 

"I guess I just thought we'd be okay?" Kindaichi repeats. "But...how do you get over a year and a half of someone ordering you around, senpai? Or someone treating you like you're not good enough."

At first, Oikawa wants to give a petty reply.

_"Don't forgive him."_

_"He doesn't deserve it."_

_"It's a trick."_

~~Okay, a few petty replies.~~

But he stops to think about his own interactions with Kageyama, limited as they were. His third year in middle school was tough; physically, mentally, and emotionally. His burning desire to prove something against Kageyama's natural talent as well as his rival, Ushijima, really warped his perspective about himself and those around him. He thinks about Kageyama and self-awareness. 

Even now, he falls back into that burning desire to prove himself to his opponents. Especially when Kageyama or Ushijima are mentioned. But unlike Ushijima, Oikawa knows Kageyama personally (if just barely). He can read Kageyama regardless if he's headfirst into all things volleyball. He can recall a tiny Kageyama following him around, asking - and, at times, _pleading_ \- to be taught how to do a jump serve.

He carefully chooses his words.

"You don't necessarily have to get over it, but you said he was trying and you thought that was okay." Oikawa laces his fingers together. His eyes flicker to Iwaizumi as he leaps into the to spike a rather poorly set ball. "I think you've already started the forgiving process."

"Akira says it was all three of our faults. I think he's right." 

"What do you mean?" Oikawa stretches his legs out, only his heels touch the gym floor.

"He changed in the middle of second year, and it was abrupt. He used to smile but then he stopped and," Kindaichi starts picking at his nails, "then he started being so demanding. But I  - I mean, Akira and me - didn't really try to understand why he was acting the way he did. We were so caught up in the demands to 'run faster' and 'jump higher' that we pushed everything away." He stops to stare at Oikawa. "How do you...suddenly just stop caring?"

Oikawa sighs. "Are you asking for yourself or for Tobio-chan?"

"Me! Him!" Kindaichi raises his hands briefly before letting them flop back down to his lap. "Both?"

"I don't think you stopped caring," Oikawa pauses to lick his dry lips, "and I don't think Tobio-chan stopped either. Him about you and you both about him, I mean. Take volleyball away, you guys hung out together and did other things I assume. Abrupt personality changes have to be the result of something drastic happening." And then he looks at Kindaichi seriously. "It doesn't mean you have to forgive him for how he treated you. It doesn't mean that things are automatically fine just because he was nice for a few weeks."

"I know that."

_Do you, Kin-chan_? "How does your shoulder feel now?"

Kindaichi rotates his shoulder and seems satisfied (and revealed for the quick subject change).

"It's fine."

"Then go play, Kin-chan." Oikawa nods his head towards his teammates. "You are their spiker after all."

* * *

Iwaizumi listens quietly as Oikawa gives a few last words of advice and encouragement for the start of official matches next week. There is a genuine concern for the team's performance and moral, uplifting them is difficult even for Oikawa. His smile strains when it's turned onto Onaku. The first-year is well aware of his unstable performance and looks down ashamed.

"Keep your head up," Oikawa states loudly. Firmly. "This is a good team. A _worthy_ team. Worthy teams do not bow their heads." And that's that.

Kitagawa Daiichi's current volleyball team collectively bows while shouting their 'thanks.'

"We'll be looking forward to your matches," Iwaizumi states as he heads for the gym entrance. 

"Have a good night!" Oikawa calls out over his shoulder just as the gym door closes behind them. The moment it's closed, he turns to Iwaizumi. "Do you remember where Tobio-chan lives?"

Oikawa wrinkles his nose. "Damn. I should have asked Kin-chan."

"And what exactly do you plan on doing once you find out where he lives? Barge into his house? Demand he rejoins?"

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa begins seriously. "If Tobio-chan doesn't rejoin, they won't make it past their first game. I can't accept that and neither will they. Imagine ending your final year on that?"

"We did," Iwaizumi answers.

"It won't be like that for us this year and next year. We are going to nationals!"

Iwaizumi glances at his watch. "Damn. It's getting late and we still have to catch the bus."

"Oh," Oikawa gasps. "You have that thing tomorrow, right? In the morning?"

Rolling his eyes, he pushes Oikawa. "You mean I'm going to meet the kid I was assigned to tutor for my service learning?"

"Yeah! That! Why do you have to do this again?"

They start power-walking to the bus stop. "It's for my political science class. It's mandatory and I can't keep pushing it off to binge-watch those stupid alien movies with you."

"For the sake of our friendship, I'm going to ignore that you said that." Oikawa's serious expression lasts a few seconds and then they're both laughing.

"Stupidkawa," Iwaizumi mumbles. "As if you'd drop me. I'd drop you first."

"Not true!"

"Yes, true!"

"Mean, Iwa-chan!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plenty mentions of Kageyama but no actual Kageyama in the chapter. Also, honestly speaking, I love Oikawa.


	9. Chapter 9

Kageyama remains silent while sitting next to his father as they wait to meet his tutor. The car ride had been equally as silent, but also stuffy with an underline of concern. Kageyama spent much of the ride to the building, Children & Success, trying to ignore the way his father looks at him, sighs, and shakes his head. Rinse and repeat. But being here now, seeing the way some adults - especially the woman sitting behind the front desk - are looking at him, makes him want to shrink into himself.

"Ignore them," he hears his father say when he shifts again. "Part of this program allows you to pick a location to be tutored at because of your age, after today. It can be at our house," Kageyama winces visibly, "or at a library." If whoever is tutoring him were to walk in on his unhappy mother...it would not be a pleasant experience. He would not want his mother to be embarrassed. 

"Kageyama Tobio."

He looks up, eyes immediately landing on a sharply dressed woman strolling towards him, and feels uncomfortable. She is wearing a dress-suit similar to what his mother wears for work or business trips and her lipstick is the same exact shade his mother wears. Her eyes are dark green and tense and stand out among her tanned skin and black hair. When she stops in front of him, she smiles encouragingly. All comparisons disappear.

Her smile is very nice.

It's warm. 

"Good morning," she begins while holding her hand. "My name is Hozumi Mari. I am one of the assistant directors of 'Make Your Future.' Our tutoring program," she quickly tacks on when he face contorts into confusion. Kageyama is nudged by his father to stand up and shake the hand still being offered to him. He does, and then his father does. "Our program has over 50 volunteers, many being high schoolers from nearby schools, and we try to assign tutors to meet the needs of those who are struggling with one or more of their current classes."

"Oh," Kageyama answers. "Um, it's nice to meet you." He shifts on his feet; awkward. "Who - uh - who is my tutor, Hozumi-san?"

"We try to place middle schoolers with high schoolers who have similar interests," Hozumi explains rather than immediately answering and anticipation starts building in Kageyama's gut. She begins herding them down the hall. "Your tutor is currently a second-year at Aoba Johsai and a member of the volleyball team. Volleyball was listed under interests."

_Oh, no._

"He's rather well-known by a lot of people." They pause outside a door with no window.

_Please, no._

She opens the door. "His name is - "

"Kageyama."

Instant relief.

"Iwaizumi-senpai," Kageyama greets with a nod. 

* * *

Approximately 15 minutes ago, Iwaizumi was given a very short list of - three names to be exact - with short descriptions about interests (things he can relate too) and areas of struggle. He saw the list of struggles before the names, concerned about how one kid can struggle with so many classes at once, and then he saw the name. He feels just a little bit bad about completely disregarding the other kids that are in need of help. 

But, well, Kageyama is his former - current? - kouhai. 

He's not going to waste an opportunity to talk to him. 

"You know each other?" Hozumi asks. "Then I'm sure things will go along swimmingly!" 

Kageyama's father peers at him curiously. Calculating. Really, this is the first time he's seen the man. He's never been to any of their games when he was a third-year at Kitagawa Daiichi. It's clear that Kageyama shares many features with his father; including the ever well-known intense blank - who was he kidding? Kageyama's dad has resting bitch face and Iwaizumi feels just a tab bit intimidated.

Although, Iwaizumi notices, his eyes soften when they fall to Kageyama.

"Text me when you're ready to be picked up, okay?"

"I can take the bus," Kageyama answers quietly. "So you don't have to leave work."

Kageyama's father sighs. "Just...think it over and text me with your choice." He steps forward to brush hair out of Kageyama's face and nods. "Ma'am. Iwaizumi-san." He leaves the room but the door remains open.

"I'm glad you two know each other. It will make things run smoother, no?" Hozumi smiles. "I'll check back in with both of you in an hour, okay?"

Iwaizumi nods.

When the door closes on them, it's silent. 

Kageyama has yet to sit down. 

"You don't have to stand the whole time," Iwaizumi says. He kicks at the seat to push it out a bit to make a point. "Pull out your homework and let us go over it."

Hesitation is something he is having difficulty associating with Kageyama. The entire 'King of the Court' mess was, admittedly, brushed to the back part of his mind because he has - _had_ \- other things to focus on. A boy who had briefly been his kouhai in middle school was not one of them (maybe that's why he feels a little shame after learning that Kageyama quit). This Kageyama is unlike the starry-eyed, eager-to-learn Kageyama who used to follow Oikawa around. 

Several seconds pass before Kageyama eases into the seat and places his bag on the table.

"What did you bring with you today?"

"Um, everything."

"Okay," Iwaizumi resists the urge to rub his temples. It is a start. "What do you want to start with?"

"English," Kageyama answers, eyes focusing on the table between them. "I have an exam coming up in a few weeks."

"Alright. English," and Iwaizumi pushes aside any personal questions he has for Kageyama to a later time.

(Kageyama deflects any questions about volleyball. He shrugs off Iwaizumi's concerns about not socializing outside of anything volleyball and the way Kindaichi and Kunimi are not so subtly brought up. Iwaizumi curses his inability to get the younger boy to speak. Part of him, although small, misses the Kageyama that would trail after Oikawa with wide, all interested eyes and asking to be taught how to perform a jump serve.)

* * *

 **[Trashykawa 09:47]:** (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ how'd it go? 

 **[Trashykawa 09:47]:** did u scare the kid w/ur mean face?

Iwaizumi glances up just in time to see Kageyama walk out the building, fast-paced towards what can only be assumed as the bus stop. The hour and 15 minutes spent together accomplished the bare minimum of the English assignments - _plural_ , as in Kageyama is falling behind horribly - and he made the younger boy promise to call or text him if he had any questions after finding out he still had his number.

 **[Trashykawa 09:52]:**  o(≧o≦)o iwa-chan!! 

 **[Iwaizumi 09:53]:** It was Kageyama.

As expected, Oikawa does not respond immediately. Iwaizumi bids the women at the front desk a 'good day' and leaves. Kageyama is not at the bus stop a few yards away from the building. The empty sight leaves him feeling...uncomfortable. He's halfway down the sidewalk, heading directly for the coffee shop they agreed to meet up at the night before when Oikawa finally replies.

 **[Trashykawa 09:59]:** how did he act around you?

Seeing 'you' instead of 'u' is a clear sign that Oikawa is taking this situation (if they can really call it that) seriously. 

 **[Iwaizumi 10:00]:** I'll be there in 2 minutes. Just wait.

 **[Trashykawa 10:01]:**  (◕︵◕)

Rolling his eyes, Iwaizumi ignores it. It's minutes later when he sees the sign for Oikawa's current favorite coffee shop - Espresso Life - and the boy himself is waiting outside. There are a few girls off to the side, each glancing at him and giggling when he smiles their way, and Iwaizumi tries not to be annoyed. He wants damn good coffee as promised and maybe a cheese danish. Or three.

"Iwa-chan!" Oikawa greets loudly.

Iwaizumi has the satisfaction of watching the girls back away when Oikawa focuses on him completely. 

"Let's go in, let's go in! It's hot outside!"

"You didn't have to wait outside, idiot!" Iwaizumi bumps shoulders with him as they walk inside, one right after the other. Their orders are simple. Iced mocha with extra chocolate drizzle for Oikawa and black coffee with sugar for himself. 

He chooses to skip out on a snack.

For now.

"So," Oikawa begins after they receive their orders, "how did things go?" He takes a casual sip and waits patiently.

It would not bother anyone outside of their friendship to see Oikawa so casual when discussing anything to do with Kageyama. Even after deciding to ignore the grapevine of rumors about Kitagawa Daiichi and Kageyama's unfortunate title; Oikawa tries very hard to be in the _know_ ; especially where Kageyama is concerned. Middle school rivalries aside, there is a genuine curiosity within Oikawa's brown eyes that leads him to speak.  

"He was quiet. Hesitant, even."

"Hesitant?" Oikawa wrinkles his nose. "Even around you? That's...surprising, but not unwarranted." 

Frowning, Iwaizumi gently swirls his coffee around before taking a careful sip. "What do you mean?" He asks after setting his mug back down.

"Tobio-chan had to have known we were visiting Kitagawa Daiichi before quitting the team. He probably didn't know how to respond to you when he saw you. Chances are that he was just as surprised to see you as you were to see him." He takes a heady sip of his iced drink and leans forward. "So, what did you talk about?"

"Mainly, just his English homework and brainstorming ways for him to memorize different parts of sentences. I gave him some tips to try out."

Oikawa leans back. "Nothing else? No mention of volleyball?"

( _Kageyama glances up every once and a while, his blank gaze flickering towards gym back in the corner of the small room but not commenting on it. Every time he finishes a sentence, he silently pushes the paper towards Iwaizumi. He doesn't complain when a lot of his answers are marked wrong. He only frowns deeply and listens to a second - third, fourth, fifth - explanation of how to identify parts of a sentence._ )

"To be honest, I think he was expecting me to speak up. But," Iwaizumi stops and considers that hesitant, purposeful distance Kageyama was maintaining between them.

"But?" Oikawa pushes. His drink is almost empty by now. The little noises he makes will likely lead him to get one to go.

" _But_ I had this feeling that if I did, he'd completely shut me out..." Iwaizumi trails off, eyes focusing on something over his friend's shoulder. "Shit!"

"What?" Oikawa asks, eyes wide in surprise.

"Damn it!"

Alarmed, Oikawa immediately turns around in his seat. "What? What is it?"

Kageyama is standing outside of the cafe, clear as day in the bright sun, and he's staring (completely frozen) at the two of them within. Iwaizumi knows he catches Oikawa's eyes just by the sound that comes from the boy sitting across from him - a hum that borders on concern - and then he catches Iwaizumi's eyes. There's something unreadable on Kageyama's face.

And then he bolts.

"Damn." Iwaizumi rubs his face and sighs. "I hope he doesn't request another tutor."

"And I'm honestly forcing myself not to chase after him. Imagine repeating the situation between him and Kin-chan. Oh, and Sleepy-chan." And it's true, Iwaizumi notices, as Oikawa maintains a tight grip on his drink with one had and fiddles with his phone with the other, fingers twitching.

"I thought he took the bus home."

"Looks like he skipped out on that."

They share a look. 

"So," Oikawa starts just after he finishes his drink. "Panic attacks, learning to be civil with his teammates, having said team want him to actually be around, freaking out after a class-related assignment, being chased around the school, quitting the team for reasons unknown, and now freaking out when he sees us. What the hell is going on with Tobio-chan? What happened? Why is he acting like this? Is he being bullied? Is something happening at home? What is going on?!"

Iwaizumi blinks. "You sound awfully concerned for someone you consider to be a _great_ annoyance."

"I'm his senpai!" 

"And?"

Oikawa stares at him for a long moment. "And I wanna' face him on the court eventually," he mumbles.

"And there it is."

"Why can't it be both?!"

Iwaizumi shakes his head. "It can be both but it's...interesting coming from you."

"He's still my kouhai." Oikawa smiles but waves away a server. "Even if he's a kouhai I want to crush~"

* * *

Kageyama braces himself against a tree, hunched over and panting. He sprinted away from the cafe the moment he saw Oikawa and Iwaizumi. When his phone vibrates briefly, he ignores it. _Just for a moment_ , he tells himself. _I just need a moment_. It's early, he realizes, to already be interacting with either of them. Too early. With Iwaizumi as his tutor, there's no doubt that Oikawa will also somehow become a bigger part of his life this time around. 

Then his phone vibrates and keeps vibrating. 

Someone is calling him.

"Where are you?"

It's his father.

Closing his eyes, Kageyama answers. "I...took a walk."

"And you didn't think to - I don't know - text me? Or call me?" Worry and anger wrapped into one. 

"I'm sorry. I," he doesn't exactly know what to tell his father, "needed some time to just think, I guess."

There's a heavy sigh on the other side of the phone. "Tobio," his father begins, "that's fine. You are allowed - you _deserve_ \- time for yourself, but that doesn't change the fact that you didn't text me about what you planned to do after your tutor session was over." A moment of silence follows, and then: "I was worried, Tobio. You should have texted me where you planned on going so I know that you're going to be okay."

"I'm sorry. I just...wasn't thinking."

A long drawn out sigh answers. "Alright. Where are you now?"

Kageyama looks around. "At a...park? I was just walking around. I'll go find a bus stop right now and head home."

"You don't - you don't have to come home right away. It's fine that you're out and about. I just want to make sure you're okay. How was your first tutoring session?"

"It was fine."

"Just fine?"

"Iwaizumi-senpai taught me some memorization techniques. I will try them out tonight. After dinner, if that's okay?"

This is followed by a tense moment of silence. When his father does speak, he almost sounds pained. Kageyama is confused. "Tobio, you don't have to ask me for permission to study at any point. I mean, if you're staying up too late, I may intervene but that's it. You can study after dinner anytime."

"Okay."

"What am I going to do with you, son?" It's followed by quiet chuckle.

"I don't know."

"Okay, well, don't stay gone too late. Don't forget to eat something. Call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay."

The sound of papers being shuffled around and then: "I will see you later, Tobio. I," there's hesitation at first but the next words make Kageyama freeze, "love you, son. I hope you know that."

The call ends after that. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow, December 7th, I will be a university graduate.  
> I'm also looking forward to the next manga update~


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Emotional/Verbal Abuse

"Why did you quit the volleyball team a week before the Spring Interhigh?"

Kageyama's pencil freezes. He knew the question would come up eventually; the Spring Interhigh starts _tomorrow_. He thinks, silently, that Onaku will be okay. Not great - the first year still has a lot to learn - but enough that they will make it to the last round and face Shiratorizawa Middle at least. ~~He hopes.~~ When he played for Kitagawa Daiichi the previous time, both teams won two sets with Shiratorizawa winning a third and thus moving on to nationals.

And he only played one set. 

"Iwaizumi-senpai," he starts, "it's not that I wanted to quit. It justed something I had to do."

"Yes, I am aware. 'Unfortunate circumstances' or whatever." Kageyama flinches but doesn't speak. "But it's like you didn't even fight against quitting." The older boy appears genuinely concerned for him. "Kageyama, are you having trouble with anyone? On the team or with another student? I heard that you were doing well for the last month or so with your teammates. Word gets around, ya' know? I just...don't get it, I suppose. You've always been ambitious when it comes to volleyball."

He opens his mouth to speak, to say something that will settle Iwaizumi's curiosity, but he doesn't know what to say that won't place his mother in a bad light.

"I - uh," he licks his lips. "I just - my - um..."

Iwaizumi leans forward while moving his worksheets out of the way as to not wrinkle them. "If I can help, let me help."

His eyes suddenly sting. "Senpai," Kageyama whispers, " _please_ just let it go. It's not - I'm fine with this." He will not cry in front of someone like Iwaizumi; the older boy wouldn't ridicule him (he's just too kind) but Kageyama would never be able to look him in the eye ever again.

Who knows if he'll tell Oikawa or not.

"Kageyama, if you were fine with this," Iwaizumi moves his head to stare him directly in the eyes, "then why are you seconds away from crying?"

Sniffling, Kageyama wipes at his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie and doesn't reply. 

"Your dad," the high schooler continues, "seems like a really good guy."

"He told me I should keep playing." 

It's mumbled.

"Then why aren't you?"

He sniffles again. "My mom doesn't approve. My grades aren't up to par or whatever. I'm barely passing my classes. I mean, I'm passing but it's not good enough."

"But you're still passing." Kageyama watches as Iwaizumi gently tugs his worksheet free from under his arms and looks over it. "This is better than before by the way."

Kageyama laughs but it's sad even to his own ears. "She and my father are opposites. He thinks passing is good enough because of - you know - how important volleyball is to me. My mother thinks my grades should be a lot better than they are. S-She's right. Volleyball - 

( _" - is a distraction!" his mother yells at the top of her lungs in the middle of another argument with his father. "Have you seen his grades, Hakaru? They're barely passing because I've let him play that stupid sport for too long!"_

_Sitting at the top of the stairs, he listens to dishes being roughly moved about and the high-pitched whistle of the teapot go off. "Kiko, passing is still passing. There's more to middle school life than perfect grades."_

_"Like what?"_

_"He should be developing healthy relationships with his classmates!"_

_The laughter he hears tumble out of his mother's mouth is dark and cruel._ )

" - is a distraction. I can't, um, really balance the two very well right now." _I guess_.

Iwaizumi shakes his head.

His pity isn't helping.

_I miss Hinata_ , Kageyama thinks after having come to the conclusion that thoughts like that aren't as nearly as random as he originally thought.

"Do you really think that?" 

"Oikawa-senpai thinks it is." Because Oikawa uses volleyball as a defining distraction, Kageyama is no fool in regards to that.

Iwaizumi's eyebrows shoot up. "Be that as it may, _he's_ not here and I'm asking _you_."

Be it this timeline or the previous one, the moment his parents start arguing severely during his second year...volleyball had become - _is_ \- his savior. He can rely on the ball to never tell his deepest secrets and insecurities to anyone when he was by himself and he became much more focused when practicing. In fact, he's now beginning to think that volleyball has kept him so busy to the point of not having to really pay much attention to the arguing and accusations were thrown about; many seeming to be true. And many later confirmed.

Even now, despite having many things explained to him by his father, he still feels so out of the loop.

Everything is a mess.

"I guess. It helps me focus."

"Kageyama - "

But he wants to drop the subject for now. "Can we go over my math homework, please?"

"You can't keep pushing this away."

Deciding not to answer, Kageyama pushes his half-completed math homework forward (he gave up in the middle of it and focused on English). "Am I dividing this correctly, senpai?"

* * *

"Why did we need to come here all of a sudden?" Kindaichi complains. He's in his heavier jacket but unfortunately left his scarf at home. A sudden cold chill fell over Miyagi the night before and carried into late afternoon. "Couldn't we just pick these energy drinks after practice tonight?" At this point, he is unsurprised that Kunimi doesn't answer him right away; the other boy picking up speed as their destination draws closer. 

"You always complain about how your favorite flavors are sold out before you get a chance to try them, so here we are. Besides, you were bored at your house and my house. This is giving us something to do."

Kindaichi pauses when a gust of wind smacks him right in the face. "Damn." When a hand grips his arm, he's tugged forward in a hurried attempt to move. 

"Standing there won't make you any less cold," Kunimi states. "We'll be inside in a moment." Kindaichi just allows himself to be dragged along and he thinks they'll be getting freezing rain tonight as the weatherman predicted early this morning (he hopes the man is wrong because travel by bus tomorrow will be slow and annoying to Sendai). 

The jingle of a bell and he's immediately incased with warmth. 

"Welcome," an elderly woman behind the register calls out. 

They greet her back politely before moving directly towards the back part of the store where the cold drinks are stored. As Kindaichi crouches to glance over the bottom row and decide which ones he wants, Kunimi heads over to the magazine selection and picks up a sports-related one with Japan's top five high school aces in the boy's division plastered all over it. It makes for light reading as Kindaichi knows he takes a long time to choose what he wants. 

He's selected four of the six he intends to buy when the door to the shop opens with the jingle of the bell, the old woman greets the newcomer, and a polite voice responds. There's a conversation heard but it draws near to their location. Kindaichi sees Kunimi shift out of the corner of his eyes and barely turns his head when the talking stops almost directly behind him.

"Repeat the brand for me, please."

A tall man steps to his side. Even from his profile, he seems vaguely familiar to Kindaichi. The more he tries to subtly note all the features, the more he feels anxious and doesn't understand why. "Excuse me," he spares Kindaichi a small, friendly smile before looking just over his crouched form. "There are 15 flavors available," the man states. When he turns slightly, Kindaichi sees what looks to be a Bluetooth earpiece - like one his mom uses while driving. "Fruity?" The questioned word is said with amusement. 

Kindaichi stands up and moves out of the way.

"I'm sorry," the man chuckles. "I'll be quick. I hope." It's tacked on quietly. "Alright, Tobio, what 'fruity' flavors do you want?"

And as simple as that, Kindaichi freezes.

_Holy -_

He's forcefully moved backward and away from the cold drinks, his own selection shoved into his hands. It's like he's experiencing an 'out of body' feeling as Kunimi moves him to the front of the store. It's no wonder he finds the man familiar.  

"That is Kageyama's _dad_ ," Kindaichi hisses under his breath. 

"I know."

"His _dad_ ," and it's spoken like he's confused and overwhelmed all at once. 

Kunimi pushes him forward firmly, steadily - always firm, always steady - to the elderly woman who smiles up at them. "Find everything you need, boys?" Kindaichi is on autopilot when he places the few drinks he picked out on the counter.

"Yes, ma'am." Times like now Kindaichi wishes he can remain calm and collected like his friend. 

Buying his drinks and hightailing it out of the store seems like a good idea in Kindaichi's opinion. 

The drinks are paid for and bagged in less than a minute and he walks fast-paced to the exit with Kunimi right on his heels just as Kageyama's dad reaches the front of the store. The moment they're outside, Kindaichi breathes in the crisp, cold air and allows the cold sting to calm his nerves. Okay, maybe he overreacted. It's clear that Kageyama's father doesn't recognize either of them.

"Just breath - " But Kunimi quiet command is cut off when the door to the store opens and Kageyama's dad steps out, bag hooked over his arm, and adjusts his thick blue scarf. 

"I'm heading home right now," he states into his earpiece. "It's a bit early but maybe I should start dinner. What do you think?" He starts walking away.

Kindaichi takes a step toward the man's direction. Kunimi blinks at him in mild interest.

"Kageyama-san!"

Kageyama's father stops abruptly and whirls around in surprise. 

"Are are you do - "

Kindaichi interrupts Kunimi by blurting out the first thing that comes to mind.

"Tell Ka - _Tobio_ \- to play for Kitagawa Daiichi tomorrow!"

The man's surprised expression morphs into a look of caution; guarded. "Tobio has expressed his desire to not play."

"With all due respect, sir," Kunimi begins when Kindaichi is at a loss for words in that moment (the reply is just above snapping), "Tobio's true desire is to play. We could see it in his eyes." The sound of Kageyama's given name seems foreign from Kunimi's mouth as much as it does from his own.

Seeing the man's face crumble painstakingly easy reminds Kindaichi of the day Kageyama freaked out in the middle of class.

"I know," the man tells them. He sighs before straightening himself out. "But I can't - _I won't_ \- force him to play." Kageyama's dad turns around but that doesn't stop either boy from hearing, "Even if I know he misses it." He starts walking away with a "Good day, boys," flung over his shoulder. 

* * *

Kageyama sits before his mother feeling like he's before the edge of a fire and flames are reaching out to lick him but miss by mere inches. 

"Where is the improvement?" She asks. In her hand is a thin stack of his graded quizzes over the course of the week. "These should be lightyears better." Between them on the table is the homework he completed with Iwaizumi's help earlier in the day.

He doesn't know how to respond. Saying, "But I passed," would only result in a rant about how he's still not doing enough. 

"I asked you a question, Tobio!"

Fingers twitching in his lap, he keeps his head bowed. "I got 6 more points than last week's math quiz." Beforehand, he'd either fail his quiz and have to retake it in order to play volleyball or he'd barely pass and moves forward. Six points  _is_ an improvement to _him_ because its six points higher than his previously graded quiz and puts him in the mid-70s grade range. 

"Quitting volleyball should show better improvement." 

"Genuine improvement doesn't happen within a week, Kiko." Instant relief floods Kageyama when his father steps into the dining room. In his hand is a bag filled with his requested sports drinks. "It's unrealistic to believe he would be making top scores when you know very well how he struggles in class. _Volleyball_ ," he sharply inserts when she opens her mouth to retort, "aside."

His mother's lips pinch as if she ate something sour. "When will you stop babying him?!"

"When will you stop pretending you care about his growth?" His father snaps in return.

Kageyama knows an argument is evitable now. 

( _"You haven't cared for his schooling beyond providing him with school supplies and a uniform!" His father sounds angrier than before._

_Kageyama stands just outside his parents' bedroom, the door cracked open about an inch. They have been arguing for a little over an hour now since his mother's surprisingly early return from her business trip. He and his father had been in the middle of cooking lunch together in companionable silence - peeling potatoes and cutting carrots - when she storms in like a fury of birds._

_The peaceful atmosphere was almost immediately ruined._

_Their arguing started when she saw his unfinished homework on the dining room table._ )

Kageyama glances up at his father, takes in his unimpressed look, glances at his mother who seems more embarrassed than anything, and sighs outwardly.

"Tobio, take these to your room and stay there for a little bit. I need to speak to your mother." The word 'mother' is spat out like poison.

"No. He's going to stay right here while I go over his homework." Then she spares him a frown of discontent. "A _good_ son would listen to his mother."

"And a _good_ mother wouldn't belittle her son's every effort to be better."

Taking the bag that is handed to him, Kageyama allows himself to be pushed gently in the direction of the stairs. "Go on, Tobio. Everything will be fine." But he still hesitates because of the arms crossed, cold stare of his mother. Her eyes are blank and her body is tense as if she's holding herself back for charging forward - and he wouldn't be surprised if she _is_ holding herself. She seems like that a lot more lately.

'We're not done,' she mouths at him. 

(Sometimes, if he really thinks about it, he wishes he could just disappear when their voices become too loud.)

* * *

"You don't understand, sweetie, because you're just not smart enough to understand."

'Sweetie' is spoken in a sickly sweet voice. 

"Let me see if I can put this in simple terms for you to understand, alright?"

It's as if she thinks he's a toddler. 

~~But even he thinks toddlers aren't spoken to like this.~~

"You continue to mess up and that's why I'm frustrated, honey."

_Don't call me honey_ , he thinks. _I don't like it_.

Kageyama just stares, not really seeing her. 

"Without me pushing you to be your best, you'd continue as is. You won't succeed without me, Tobio."

_I don't think you're right_.

"By quitting the volleyball club, you show that you care about your grades."

_You_ made _me quit_.

"I just want you to do better."

_When will I be 'better' in your eyes?_

He nods. "Yes, ma'am."

* * *

Kageyama is sitting on his bed, tossing his volleyball up in the air over and over again. Since his conversation - one-sided and painfully awkward - with his mother ended, things have settled in the household once again. His parents haven't spoken since their argument earlier and dinner is almost ready. Dinner by his mother is less enjoyable than his father's but he'll manage through it.  

At a knock on his bedroom door, Kageyama hides the ball underneath his thick comforter and relaxes against his propped out pillow. "Come in," he calls out and hopes he doesn't look suspicious.

"Dinner is almost ready," his father states by way of greeting. "I'm not sure what your mother is making by the smell of it but it should be okay." He steps into the room but his arms aren't empty. The man appears a bit sheepish at first until Kageyama's bedroom is closed and he fully presents what he has. "I had this cleaned earlier this week because I had hoped that you would change your mind before tomorrow."

His volleyball uniform looks brand new. The dark blue of his sleeves doesn't look machine washed anymore. It's amazing, really. A deep ache develops in the middle of his chest when he looks at it. Though he can certainly say that he prefers the black uniform of Karasuno, there's something unique and eye-catching about Kitagawa Daiichi's volleyball uniform; something less bitter and more comfortable when looking at it now. 

"I quit the team."

"Because of something your mother said." His father moves closer and lays his uniform over his desk chair. "You're not stupid, Tobio. You don't need excellent in your classes."

"But - "

"Do you try your hardest to get good grades?"

"Yes - "

"Then that's enough. You've only been tutoring under Iwaizumi-san for a week and there are already small improvements. I'm proud of you, Tobio."

Kageyama freezes though his gaze does snap to his volleyball jersey.

"I ran into two of your teammates today. One of them, a tall boy with spiky hair, told me to tell you to play with them tomorrow. I think you should." He sits down on Kageyama's bed and pulls the volleyball out from beneath the comforter with ease. "Of course, I won't force you if you truly don't want to...but I know you miss it."

"But she said quitting volleyball shows that I care more about my grades." Kageyama looks down at his hands in his lap. "I do care about my grades."

"And I care more about your happiness right now. We all make sacrifices, but that doesn't mean we're not allowed to enjoy things. The benefits of being physically active and happy outweigh your mother's burning desire for you to be a top student. You don't have to be a top student, just a student who tries his best."

"I don't know. I don't want her to be mad at me."

His father places the volleyball in his hands. "Let me worry about her." A moment of silence and then, "I...don't think I've been to any of your games since elementary school."

"You've been busy."

Sighing, his father rubs the left side of his temple. "Please stop making excuses for me, Tobio. I'm guilty of many things involving you."

"I," Kageyama pauses to lick his dry lips, "want to play. I want to play so much."

He wishes he could smile like his father is now.

"In the morning, I will drive you to Sendai's gym."

"What about her?"

"Your mother has unfortunately been called into work and is required to stay the majority of the day. It happened in the middle of our...discussion. Convenient, I must say. If we don't make it back before her, I'll create an excuse."

Kageyama squeezes the ball. "I want to go."

"Then you're going." Kageyama looks at his uniform and nods. "Hide it from her, okay? In fact, pack it right away."

"Dinner is ready," comes the distant call from downstairs.

"Pack it first and then come downstairs."

"Yes, sir."

"Things will be okay, Tobio. I promise."

And Kageyama can't help but believe him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY NEW YEAR!   
> I live in North America so it's still New Year's Eve!
> 
> It's been a little while since I updated but I'm here now!  
> Since graduating, things have been a little hectic.  
> It's all good now.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read the note at the end.  
> Thank you!

Kageyama watches, from a distance (and while partially hiding behind his father), as his former - current? - teammates file into the stadium in a slow, almost sad pace (he can see Kindaichi's hunched shoulders). He remembers being here the previous time, something that seems so long ago, where winning was the number one (1) thing on his mind. Recalling the moment he stepped off the bus the first time, he had been in the back; just a few feet away and never part of the crowd Kitagawa Daiichi made up.

"Why don't you go meet up with them?"

"I will," Kageyama mumbles. "I'll meet them in the locker room. But first," he pauses to glance around, "I need to do something. Don't wait up for me, okay?" At the concerned look sent his way, he sighs. "I'm going to see if I can find someone."

His father tilts his head just a bit. "Find someone?"

"A...friend." _I hope_. 

"Oh," his father seems to light up just a bit. "Okay. Go find your friend - but be quick. You still need to talk to your teammates."

For a moment, Kageyama hesitates. He sort of feels like he is having an out-of-body experience. Somewhere inside that building is Hinata and his team made up of friends and classmates he begged to help him or whatever. Kageyama knows, even if he doesn't participate, that Hinata's team won't advance beyond their first game. It just won't happen. Hinata simply doesn't have the experience yet. 

Even still, he wants to see Hinata. 

He _really_ wants to see Hinata.

"Everything will be okay, Tobio. I know it will be."

"We'll be in the second gym, at court B. The best place to sit is off to the left side of the middle." He states this and then walks away, not worrying about what his father might say. He's not even called out to.

Truthfully, Kageyama doesn't know exactly where to go just yet. He knows Hinata will move toward the bathroom at some point but not actually make it just yet because he's confronted by a few bench warmers from Kitagawa Daiichi who poke fun at his height and easily scared responses. Even when they didn't know each other then, he's not the type to completely dismiss someone just because they don't meet the ideal height and build for volleyball. 

Whispers pick up around him when he steps into the building. 

His reputation is nothing but a pain in the a - "Ah, so Tobio-chan really did decide to show up."

_I haven't even seen Hinata yet_ , Kageyama whines inside his head.

At this point, he doubts he'll see the other boy before their game.

Turning around, Kageyama politely dips his head for a moment towards Oikawa and Iwaizumi. The two high schoolers are dressed in casual clothes; Oikawa sporting his favored dark blue jacket and glasses while Iwaizumi simply wears comfortable-seeming jeans and a shirt. Both gaze at him fairly neutral, though their eyes speak volumes of how pleased they are to see him. 

"Changed your mind?" Iwaizumi asks with a small smile.

"My father..." And he doesn't say anything else.

"Tobio-chan, why aren't you in the locker room? You need to hurry up and change."

It's strange to see this side of the older boy.

A nicer, more concerned side that even has Iwaizumi glancing at him in brief surprise. 

"They don't know I'm here yet."

"Ah, so you need to go beg to them then." Oikawa nods as if his statement is completely logical.

Iwaizumi bumps his shoulder roughly. "Don't be a jerk, Crappykawa!"

Kageyama just shrugs. "He's not exactly wrong, senpai."

"Oh, Tobio-chan." Oikawa sighs. "Listen, just walk in and say your peace. Even if you feel like you're not 'good enough' for them, as it seems, it doesn't mean you aren't good. They need you."

Watching Iwaizumi's irritation deflate is interesting. "Wow. I didn't think you had heart enough to say something like that."

Oikawa's face contorts into annoyance. "I have plenty of heart!"

"Whatever." Iwaizumi rolls his eyes before turning his attention back to Kageyama. "Get going. We'll be in the stands, alright?"

"Oh, okay." Kageyama starts to turn, pauses, and then turns to face both of them again. "My father is here. He doesn't know much about volleyball but he's...trying."

Iwaizumi seems to get what he's not outright saying while Oikawa appears to be confused. "Don't worry," Iwaizumi tells him. "I'll take care of it."

"Take care of what?"

But Kageyama turns to finally walk away while Iwaizumi follows his action but in the opposite direction.

"Iwa-chan!" Kageyama hears. "Explain!"

Kageyama decides to head to the locker room, say what he needs to say, hopes it's enough, and find Hinata after he changes (if he's lucky enough to win over his former - current? - teammates).

* * *

Kindaichi shoves his bag into his chosen locker and just barely keeps himself from slamming it shut. Next to him, silent as ever, stands Kunimi who calmly closes his own locker. Their captain is speaking softly to their coach, both seem stressed and he can't bring himself to pretend not to know why. The tense space that Kageyama usually fills is only awkward ~~and even unfitting~~ for Onaku.

"Alright," their captain claps his hands to gain their attention. "Just as we practiced during the week. Our starting line will remain the same." He tries to keep a smile on his face but it doesn't quite reach his eyes.

"When's our first game?" A second-year asks. "And who is it against?"

"20 minutes," Coach answers. "Yukigaoka."

A soft hum comes from Kindaichi's right side. "I haven't heard of that school before."

"This is their first year." Captain Tachi seems to be looking through a relatively thin stack of stapled papers. "Little stats are known. Apparently, and I'm just going by rumor here, there's a member that can jump really high - "

"He can jump beyond your expectations." Along with everyone else, Kindaichi's head jerks to the locker room exit. A giddy sort of feeling builds in the pit of his stomach to see Kageyama standing there, with his signature shoulder bag, and calm expression in place. "Don't let his looks deceive you."

Onaku speaks first. "Kageyama-senpai!" He moves as if he can't decide to run at Kageyama to hug him or not.

Kageyama holds up his hand to halt him. "Can I speak first?" Though he holds his hand up to stop Onaku, his eyes flicker between their coach and captain and then everyone else.

The relief on coach's face is enough but it's Captain Tachi that nods. "Go ahead." 

Kageyama sighs. "Here's, uh, the thing. I haven't been a very good teammate or senpai to you guys." A few snorts, Kindaichi's included, follow this statement. "It wasn't until a little while back that I realized that." His expression twists a little funny before reverting back to a much more normal look. "I was pushy and demanding and I expected more than I should have, that wasn't in my right to demand, and it justifiably made you all mad and made me an outcast." He pauses before looking directly at Kindaichi and Kunimi. "I said things that really hurt you and I wish I could take them back."

Out of the corner of his eye, Kindaichi watches Kunimi shift his stance and cross his arms. 

"We're supposed to be a team and, if you're willing, I would like to show you that I can be a good teammate."

"Why did you quit in the first place?" Onaku, ever the curious boy, asks.

There's hesitation. There's an uncomfortable expression. There's silence.

"Sorry for prying - "

"No." Kageyama shakes his head. "No, it's alright." He closes his eyes briefly. "My mom doesn't...fully approve of me playing volleyball because it, uh, affects my studies. They aren't the best."

Kindaichi begrudgingly thinks it's pretty brave for Kageyama to put that out in the open.

"But she let you come today?" Onaku asks with excitement but Kageyama's expression hardly alters.

"My dad brought me here."

_Oh_ , Kindaichi thinks immediately. _I get it now_. 

"Well," their coach begins (and he doesn't seem the least bit concerned), "let's tackle that later. I assume your uniform is in your bag."

"Yes, sir."

"Then change."

Kageyama remains still. "Onaku," he addresses the first-year in front of everyone, "is this okay with you?"

Onaku smiles easily, reassuringly. “Of course!” He even steps forward slowly as if Kageyama is a frightened animal. “I’m much better as a pinch server right now anyway.” Then, almost shyly, he adds: “I’m really glad you’re here, senpai.”

Kageyama nods before he glances around the room. “I want to earn forgiveness but I don’t think this is the right situation to earn it but considering - ”

“Just play _with_ us and don’t be so demanding,” Kunimi interrupts smoothly. “You want to prove yourself, so do it.”

Even though there’s no verbal response, Kageyama does move away from the door. He boldly takes the locker next to Kunimi and the other boy doesn’t react beyond a mere eyebrow raised. Kageyama is quick to change, twitchy during the typical speeches about how to act before setting foot on the court, and he leaves along with two other team members but doesn’t mention where he’s headed to.

There's a brief order to be back in time.

“We’ll have to talk to him eventually,” Kunimi states. “What he said at school could have just been a reaction to being chased all over the place.”

Kindaichi blushes profusely. “That…wasn’t one of my best moments.”

Sitting down on one of the benches, Kunimi undoes his left shoelaces and reties them. “Do you think he’s having trouble with his mom at home? To make him quit despite it being the only thing he clearly cares about the most, it seems harsh.”

He keeps his voice down so the first-years don’t develop the need to eavesdrop.

“I don’t know.” Kindaichi scratches the back of his head. “We just met his dad, like, a week ago and he seems nice.”

“Maybe his father is having trouble with his mother.” Hearing Kunimi speaking blankly makes Kindaichi feel uneasy. “These are just speculations but even when we were closer back then, he never mentioned his parents beyond saying they were always busy.”

* * *

He stands around the bathroom area for several minutes, painstakingly waiting for that familiar orange hair to pop up. Various members of different teams past by, speaking loudly and laughing without a care, but no Hinata. There's a fear deep in the pit of his stomach of thinking he missed intervening in the original confrontation between some of the unruly second years of Kitagawa Daiichi and Hinata. 

Sure, he will see Hinata during their game but he wanted a chance to speak to him before they go toe-to-toe (something that did happen in their first match even if Hinata's team was just thrown together as friends helping him out). When a bell goes off and a speaker begins explaining that teams need to head to their assigned court, Kageyama sighs.

_So much for_ -

Something or, rather, someone runs into him at full force and he's taking several steps backward in an attempt to accommodate the force but trips and lands on his bum. Pain flares up his tailbone and he's seconds away from snapping when his vision is filled with dark orange hair and arms wrap around his neck to squeeze with unsurprising strength. Shock overcomes his anger, briefly, and then he's shoving Hinata back only to get right into his face.

"What was that for, dumbass?!"

Hinata, in his ghastly green middle school volleyball uniform, only leans forward to the point of Kageyama actually leaning back to avoid face touching. His amber eyes search from something in Kageyama's eyes and, apparently finding it, his lips break out into a full grin. "You remember me!" He yells, it attracts attention, and Kageyama knows his face is red. 

"Of course I do, dumbass! No one can forget someone as annoying as you!"

Grin morphing into a scowl, Hinata gets right back into his face as best he can. "Don't be rude, Bakeyama! I spent forever figuring out why I was shorter and why my uniform looked funny! It was driving me mad!"

"Dumbass," but it's said more fondly because that's such a Hinata thing to do.

"We're going to be playing against each other." Hinata's grin is back.

"Yeah."

Hinata then wrinkles his nose. "My team isn't going to do so well..." Grin. Always smiling or grinning unless someone mentions his height or grades. Or Tsukishima is around. "But that's okay. I'm grateful they came to help me and we're going to give it our all! I helped them practice too."

"In a few months, we'll be at Karasuno so it won't matter anyway." Kageyama pushes him all the way off and stands. There's some dull pain but nothing that would prevent him from playing. "And next time, don't tackle people to the ground. That hurts!"

Hinata pops up. "Hey, it was an accident! I was just excited to see you!"

Feeling his face heat up, Kageyama snorts before walking away. "Go find your team, idiot. They're probably waiting for you." There's so much more he wants to say to Hinata about his home, Kitagawa Daiichi, about how miserable he's been since waking up in the past, about missing Karasuno, but Hinata just salutes him with ease and races past him while tossing a smile over his shoulder. 

"See you on the court, Bakeyama!"

Watching him leave made Kageyama feel...something he didn't like, in a sense. And something bitter replaces his happiness at seeing Hinata. It's not like he won't see Hinata again after the game. But watching him leave doesn't seem right.

_Why is it weird to see him leave_?

He heads to the gym at a slower pace.

_I don't like watching him go_.

Kageyama shakes his head.

_Give it your all, dumbass_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking over a month to update. A lot of things have happened and I really didn't have the motivation to write, re-write, and edit on top of a busy job. I am still settling in with this job despite my time with it thus far. Just know that even if I take longer to update, I won't abandon this story.


	12. Chapter 12

"Have you met Kageyama's parents?"

Oikawa walks alongside Iwaizumi and ponders the question for just a moment. The halls are less crowded now that everyone is navigating towards the gym. They are nearing the vending machines so he - Iwaizumi - can purchase a blue Gatorade.

"Met them? No. I think I may have seen them in passing at one point when Tobio-chan was a first-year." He vaguely recalls a tall-ish, unsmiling woman and a man in an expensive trenchcoat stepping into the gym right behind Kageyama on the first day of practice, speaking minimally with the coach, before leaving. 

Iwaizumi hums. "His dad seems nice, I suppose. It seems pretty clear that he is concerned about Kageyama. Emotionally, I think."

"You're taking an awful big interest in Tobio-chan, Iwa-chan. Is there something you wanna' share?"

Rather than immediately replying, Iwaizumi starts digging in his pockets for loose change. "I care about that kid," he answers after a moment, "and it seems like he's been having a lot of trouble lately with socializing and then there's that mess about not getting along with his teammates."

Pushing Iwaizumi's money-filled hand away, Oikawa pulls out his own wallet and fishes out the money. "I owe you from last week," he says in response of receiving a confused face.

"You remember that and still watched me struggle for those coins?" 

Oikawa laughs. "I don't drink soda often but I really wanted that Pepsi last week and I forgot my wallet."

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes. "You're allowed to enjoy - "

"I already told you I have business here!"

They both paused and, curiosity getting the better of them, walk to the corner of where the vending machines are located and peek around it. Oikawa hears Iwaizumi's grunt of surprise and then studies the man for a few moments. Tall and broad-shouldered, this man could (probably) be an older version of Kageyama. The jacket he is wearing is clearly more on the expensive end but it suits his lean build. 

_Is Tobio-chan's family rich_?

Oikawa is quickly pulled back by the collar of his shirt. "Iwa-chan," he whines softly. "Don't stretch the collar!"

"Be quiet."

They hear a snort followed by: "Tobio is with some friends. Considering it's the weekend, he should be allowed to be with them, yes?" Whoever is on the other side of the call doesn't sound happy given the growing volume of noise exiting the handheld. "I honestly don't understand how you can be against him socializing with kids his age. He shouldn't have to defend why he wants friends."

"True," Oikawa hears Iwaizumi mumble under his breath. 

"So are grades," Kageyama's father snaps into the phone. "You're so obsessed with holding him to such a high standard that you don't even realize how miserable he is."

_An overbearing mother?_

"My next meeting starts in two minutes. I need to go." Without offering a farewell, he abruptly ends the call.

It's at that moment that Oikawa allows himself to be pulled away from that location; thankfully not by the collar this time. It's obvious that Kageyama's dad will need a few minutes to compose himself before entering the gym. The players of Kitagawa Daiichi are in the process of being announced to the audience as they power walk to the gym. The team they are facing is only made up of seven players and Oikawa finds their green uniforms to be an eyesore. 

One player, in particular, stands out.

"How tall do you think he is?" Oikawa points to the shortest member of the opposing team. 

"Probably not even 160 centimeters," Iwaizumi answers. 

Humming, Oikawa glances at where Kageyama is standing behind the left middle blocker. "Tobio-chan sure seems very interested in him."

It's true.

In fact, Oikawa would be Kageyama solely has eyes for the short red-head in the position of center middle blocker; a place he wouldn't put the boy personally. Kageyama's gaze is a clear indicator that whatever is being announced over the speakers is going right over hiss head. Standing among the audience, Oikawa knows the boy is speaking to Kageyama just by the facial expressions coming from his underclassman.

* * *

After their team breaks for the start of the game, Kageyama takes a swing from his water bottle and then heads out onto the court. Hinata is waiting right there, on the opposite side of the net, and it feels off. Wrong. Judging by the half-hearted smile sent his way from the shorter boy, he understands that Hinata isn't all that comfortable being on the other side either. 

"Shouldn't you be in a good mood?" He asks as other members of Kitagawa Daiichi walk onto the court. "Here's your second chance to show me what you got."

Hinata scowls. "I am!" Then his face drops. "It just - you know - feels weird to be on the other side. We're such a good team and I miss your tosses!" 

"Wait, what?" Kageyama turns his head slightly to see a wide-eyed Kindaichi. "You 'miss' his tosses?"

"Hi, Turnip Head!" Hinata grins. "I like Kageyama's tosses because they're 'wosh' and 'bam' and it's amazing!"

"'Wosh' and 'bam.'"

Quickly coughing to cover up his laugh, Kageyama shrugs. "He's a special case. And super demanding." Hinata squawks in protest, fire lighting up in his eyes, and everyone watches as Hinata start rambling about how 'Bakeyama doesn't even complain when I ask _most of the time_.' 

_I missed you, dumbass_.

Hinata abruptly stops and someone politely coughs off on the side.

At that moment, he realizes he said that out loud as well. 

But then, Hinata smiles. "Missed you to, Yamayama-kun." The referee blows his whistle, Hinata moves away to greet Kitagawa Daiichi's captain and shake hands, before returning to his spot where he takes a 'ready' position with slightly bent knees and determined grin looking up at him. "Don't underestimate us."

( _"Don't underestimate us," Hinata calls out just before Karasuno faces Fukurōdani for the sixth time during training camp._

_Hinata's idol, the older boy with his hair completely spiked like an owl, laughs loudly and claps a hand to his large bicep. "Wouldn't dream of it!"_

_Fukurōdani's silent setter, the slightly shorter of the pair, places a hand on the older boy's shoulder and calmly asks him to get into position._

_"Let's do this," Hinata states the moment he's at his side._

Yes _, Kageyama thinks,_ lets _._ )

"I haven't done that in a long time," he answers honestly while also settling in his position. "You had some time," Kageyama nods toward Hinata's middle school teammates. "Show me what you taught them."

He issued the challenge.

He looks forward to Hinata's response.

* * *

Hinata doesn't fail to meet him where he's at.

* * *

"Holy shit," Iwaizumi breathes out. "That kid can jump high."

Oikawa nods, eyes wide and hands gripping the railing tightly. He's amazed and...a bit jealous. Even from an elevated location, he can see the different glances between Kageyama and the short boy with orange-ish hair. Some playful. Others are much more challenging. No doubt there are petty remarks between them as other members of both teams stare of them strangely.

"Tobio-chan looks like he's having fun."

"You know my son along with Iwaizumi-san?"

Jumping in surprise, Oikawa turns around fast. "Kageyama-san, hello," he starts. Iwaizumi echoes his greeting. "Um, yes. I'm Tobio-chan's senpai; Oikawa Tooru. I played on Kitagawa Daiichi's volleyball time my entire time there along with Iwa-chan."

An expression of familiarity appears on Kageyama's father's face. "Oh, Tobio used to mention you a lot a few years ago. He really admires you. Both of you, actually. He said your jump serve is amazing," he nods to Oikawa, "and your spikes are killer," he nods to Iwaizumi. "Something about how you two make a dynamic duo." 

Oikawa feels the echo of an old ache, something _ugly_ (if he's honest), in the pit of his stomach. 

( _He's agitated about the loss._

_He just wants to practice by himself while everyone else is leaving._

_Tobio-chan is right there, asking him a question - "Oikawa-senpai, will you teach me your jump serve?" - with a smile, and he snaps._

_His hand is flying before he can think properly, and there's Iwa-chan, and he sees Tobio-chan's surprised face, and -_ )

"It's nice to meet you properly, Kageyama-san!" Oikawa states cheerfully.

But Kageyama's father isn't having it.

"You don't have to fake a smile for me, Oikawa-san."

Oikawa hears Iwaizumi make a sound that suspiciously sounds like a laugh. Sort of.

"Sir - "

"I'm aware of something happening between you and Tobio once he stopped mentioning you towards the end of his first year. I hope it can be resolved one day." 

"You're perspective, Kageyama-san." It's out of his mouth without consideration, sounding rude with his careless tone. "I'm sorry. That came out rude."

Kageyama's father waves away his apology. "I'm not offended nor am I incorrect."

"I - no, sir. You are not."

What else could he say in this situation? Standing before him in the father of the boy he's felt inferior to since his third year of middle school. This man gazes at him calmly, understandably, and does not judge him for having a, admittedly, poor relationship with his only child. He left middle school with some regrets, but his biggest regret involves his inability to just let Kageyama speak.

"Did you convince Tobio to keep playing, Kageyama-san?" Hearing Iwaizumi speak after not doing so for a while feels Oikawa with relief. "After all, we didn't expect him to be here at all no matter the attempted convincing on my end."

"My son doesn't express interest in many things and he often keeps to himself," the man starts after sighing, "but volleyball is the one thing I know makes him happy. I just want him to be happy." 

"Do you want to sit with us?" Oikawa offers it because he's 1) curious to learn about Kageyama's father and 2) he wanted to beat Iwaizumi in asking the question. 

"Oh, I wouldn't want to intrude." 

It's spoken with genuine kindness and only serves to drive Oikawa to push for it. So, to save all of them from a small push-and-pull moment, he's honest. "Please join us, Kageyama-san. We're curious about you. Plus, we can provide answers about the sport if you're unsure of what's happening."

"If you insist." He moves to sit down and it's unsurprisingly graceful. He even crosses one leg over the other. "Thank you."

Oikawa sits down on his left with Iwaizumi right next to him. 

"So, Kageyama-san" Iwaizumi begins, "do you know that shorter boy on the opposing team? The one that jumps high?"

(Oikawa enjoys explaining the inner layers of volleyball whenever he is asked a question.

Iwaizumi watches as obvious playful banter is exchanged between Kageyama and the short boy.

And no, Kageyama's dad did not know who the boy is that is very familiar with his son.)

* * *

Kageyama steps away from his team during their break when Hinata starts approaching. Hinata is sweating heavily. Though it's clear that he has taught his middle school teammates a thing or two about volleyball, he is moving the most amongst them. And, frankly, Hinata's setter isn't good. At all. The boy has no real clear direction; he solely focuses on getting it up in the air. 

"How do you feel?" Hinata manages to get out over his heavy breathing.

It takes a moment before Kageyama understands what he's actually asking.

"Different," he provides as an answer. "Better. We won't be _there_ for a while, but it's better than before."

Hinata smiles even though he's sweaty and showing signs of being tired. "I'm happy."

"You're covering almost every aspect out there, dumbass. You need to let your teammates play. Even if they're not good at it. You're burning yourself out." The referee blows his whistles.

"I know," Hinata states. "But we're going to be fine." He turns around to walk away but not before calling over his shoulder: "We've lasted longer than 30 minutes already."

* * *

"I want to know more about that boy," Iwaizumi murmurs to Oikawa. "I think he's good for Kageyama."

He hears Oikawa hum. "I think so."

"Hm?" Kageyama's father leans forward to look at each of them. 

"That boy has a way with getting Tobio-chan to interact with him seemingly easily," Oikawa states. "That's good. Although," he pauses to chuckle, "I don't think that makes Sleepy-chan and Kin-chan very happy."

Iwaizumi focuses on Kunimi and Kindaichi and, true to Oikawa words, they don't appear very happy to see Kageyama talk to the short boy so easily. He'd go as far as to say Kindaichi is openly jealous and Kunimi is analyzing the boy from head-to-toe and back, accessing him in the way that alpha would before challenging another alpha. It's not a perfect analogy, but it works. 

"Considering his relationship with them, it would make sense. Kage - Tobio - is speaking freely with this boy while there's still tension between him and them."

"They asked me to tell him to play with them. If I'm honest, it was a good push for me to speak to him about playing again. It had only been about a week or two but Tobio was upset. This is good for him. It's him out of the house and away from her. I am grateful that they stopped me to ask that night I picked up some energy drinks for Tobio."

While response, Iwaizumi remains silent.

_Away from her?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry.
> 
> I will work harder to provide updates as quick as I can.

**Author's Note:**

> If you have the time, please review. ♡


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